Cellulitis. They said Mother has cellulitis. I guess that is true. It doesn't entirely explain all the rash but maybe it does. I don't know. Anyway, May is going to take her to the dermatologist tomorrow because even if I felt like it, there is no way I should expose Mother and all those people-at-risk in the assisted living to this cold and that's all it is. Just a cold.
But I'm miserable.
The weather has been a perfect metaphor for what I have. Not really raining, not really freezing. Just drizzling and chilly. I've watched so much crap TV today and when Mr. Moon got home I suddenly felt weepy and bitchy and wanted to fuss like a little child and I did a little bit and he doesn't deserve that. Not one bit. He is such a good man. He took Mother to the ER and then my brother Chuck came and took over so he good go back to work but he did it. He took her.
So anyway, I'm making one of his favorite suppers which is eggrolls and hot and sour soup with an egg in it, stirred in just right and I'm not sure why he loves this meal but he does. It's all vegetables and tofu and tofu is not his favorite thing by a very long shot but he likes it fine when it's wrapped up in an eggroll wrapper with cabbage and green onions and bean sprouts and baked in the oven.
I guess I don't like feeling weak and sick. It makes me feel like a child and I don't want to feel like a child because a child can be helpless and that's the last thing I want to be. But. Sometimes we feel that way and really, it is okay. Especially if we have a family to step in and help. Not only us but to do the things that normally we would do. To say, "It's okay. Here. Let me take this weight off you. Now you go rest."
He bought me some NyQuil, Mr. Moon did. I'm going to take some later on. Why not? And then I'll sleep and it'll be good and I'll rest some more and soon enough I'll feel better. The sky will clear and the rain will stop and before I know it, the redbud will come out.
That is the way of it.
Winter is okay. Being sick is okay. Both are just part of life. Part of the bargain we make when we're born. Or something. I don't really know.
I just know that there are resting times and that for me, this has to be one of them.