Phew. What an afternoon. We did go look at that house and I so wanted not to like it because...well, that is very complicated and I may discuss that further later on here. But overall, as you know well, anything that disrupts my life is something to be feared. Not just avoided but feared. And avoided. And buying another house that we would only use for fun and family gatherings sounds to me like a beautiful thing and at the same time, a thing to be sore afraid of.
As it says in the Bible.
Add to that the fact that this house is very large and newish and to me, very fancy, and you have a bit of a meltdown/breakdown situation.
So no. I did not want to like it. Inside I have been fuming because Mr. Moon knew I said that I did not want a house in that location. I have passed by that area for eons and never once have I thought, "I sure would love to have a house here."
It's miles from a grocery store. As in- many, many miles. It's on the bay, not the ocean. It's right by a highway. It's...well. I don't know. I just never considered it.
But I promised I would go look at it. That is only fair. And so he took me there today and I have to say that it is a beautiful house. Absolutely. There are things about it that I am not in love with. It does not appear that it's built to have open windows which, if you're on the coast especially, is something I consider to be of utmost importance. Why live on the water if you can't smell and feel the air when it's cool enough or warm enough to open it up?
Another thing is that it's pretty big. As in four bedrooms and three? four? bathrooms. An open kitchen and living room and sunroom floor plan.
Another thing is that it's pretty big. As in four bedrooms and three? four? bathrooms. An open kitchen and living room and sunroom floor plan.
Which I used to think was pretty cool but then I realized one day that having an open floor plan meant that I'd be trying to cook dinner while sports were on the TV just a few yards away. Still- look how pretty. And the floors are gorgeous oak, the cabinets finely made of pecan, the countertops some sort of marble-like substance.
The people selling the house are quite old. One of them is dying. And the family does not want to have to deal with all of the things in the house which means that it comes as is. I think. Which is sort of cool- towels! sheets! dishes! and so forth but when I tell you that every drawer and every cabinet is filled with things, I am not lying. There is an overabundance of things in this house. Whoever decorated it never met a surface or wall she did not want to cover. And some of the things on surfaces and walls are not bad, artistic-wise. But others are just ridiculous overflow. I swear it has as many pictures on the wall as a museum. And most of the pictures are not bad! But then there are so many other things which I am sure much money was spent on at coastal decorating shops.
But who am I to judge? I hang aprons on the wall and Christmas lights that have been up for a decade. Dolls from different countries and pictures galore that my grandchildren have made.
But.
It is a beautiful house.
And then I started exploring the outside of the house and my heart sort of melted.
There is jungle on the lot which acts as buffer to the houses next door and to the highway.
Oaks and scrub oaks. Magnolias and palmettos. Palm trees and old, old pines.
That oak is directly behind the house on the water.
And speaking of water.
Although it's hard to see, that's Dog Island off in the distance. And from that dock we could swim and I imagine that dolphins probably come in right there and we saw pelicans and heard gulls and Mr. Moon saw mullet jump from the shore. Hell, there's probably bears in the jungle.
Okay. I am overwhelmed with emotions. I realized on our way home that part of my problem with this house is that I formed my opinions of what a house should be in Roseland where my granny and granddaddy lived in a tiny cabin. Nothing fancy in the least. But a river across the white sand road and nature all around. I guess that funk and simplicity became beautiful to me in my childhood. Meanwhile, my husband who grew up not in poverty but certainly not in wealth, dreamed of growing up and playing in the NBA and buying mansions for himself and for his parents.
Such different images of beauty and success.
Such different images of beauty and success.
Well. Here's the deal- Mr. Moon has not yet done all of his due diligence which involves a great deal of research and work. He's done a lot, but not all. We would have to figure out things like screening in windows and part of the back deck that overlooks the bay. We have to figure out whether the kids would enjoy staying there. It's a few miles from the beautiful beaches at St. George but a hell of a lot closer than Tallahassee. Would that work? Could I find something to do there that would make me happy beyond cooking and doing laundry? How much work would it take to get rid of some of the busy-ness of the walls and surfaces? And cabinets? And drawers?
I think of the little sideboard at Dog Island that has a drawer and two cabinets. The drawer has napkins that were there when we bought it, homemade and never hemmed but absolutely utilitarian. We filled the top of the sideboard with shells and pottery and driftwood we found on the beach. The cabinet on the left held the liquor, some of it from over twenty years ago when we bought it. And here's what the equivalent, I guess, in what this house looks like.
This ain't Funky Town, y'all.
I used to say "things will unfold as they should" but then I got older and things happened that should not have happened, I don't care what anyone says. BUT. Sometimes you just have to think that they will. Trust that they will?
And even just contemplating this purchase has revealed quite a bit to me about myself and that alone is worth the sturm und drang I've been going through about it all. I doubt that my husband would agree but here we are.
To be continued.
Love...Ms. Moon
I see all sides of this. I especially see the responsibility for cleaning and supplying another large house far from anything you forgot to supply. I see how beautiful, if crammed it is. And I see how a man would never worry about actually running such a place, since he won't have to.
ReplyDeleteI also see that the anxiety about responsibility of a house a distance from the one I live in may be mine rather than yours!
So continue musing and we'll see where it comes out.
Thank you, Liz, for that fair and rational assessment. And I found your comment in spam! It was not lost.
DeleteThat's a very pretty house, on the water. Pictures and stuff can be taken off of the walls quite easily. If you can afford it, why not?
ReplyDeleteWell, theoretically pictures and stuff can be removed easily but then what do you do with them? You couldn't just haul them all to a thrift store. Some of them appear to be semi-valuable. And there's just so much.
DeleteIf they aren't yours and you don't want them, why not a thrift store?
DeleteI wrote a socking long comment which publisher and has now gone away.
ReplyDeleteFound it!
DeleteThank you.
DeleteWow, is all I can manage! You certainly *could* make it your own fairly easily.....and the scenery (and house) are lovely......but....but....but. Windows *must* have to be able to open, for one, but the open floor plan would grow on you in time. I bet your brain is spinning!
ReplyDeleteSusan M
My brain and my heart do not know what to do with themselves. There are so many factors here. Many of them my own emotional crap.
DeleteOMG ... That place is gorgeous! It would be a treat to be able to spend any time there!!
ReplyDeleteIt is indeed gorgeous.
DeleteIt is gorgeous. I fully understand the angst of change but I am sure you will overcome that. Imagine the memories the kids would have of holidays there. And it is so different from home it would be a lovely break.
ReplyDeleteThat is definitely something to consider.
DeleteDo give it careful consideration, it looks like a pretty good house & property, will no doubt need some changes, but certainly worth a long and careful look.
ReplyDeleteI am no longer simply rejecting it out of hand. I am not, however, convinced in any way.
DeleteYou’re going to need a bigger Roomba.
ReplyDelete🤣🤣🤣🤣
DeleteThere's already a Ralph there!
DeleteThis will take a lot of consideration. Waiting to hear...
ReplyDeleteYou know I'll be reporting in on the situation.
DeleteNo
ReplyDeleteMary that is the first comment your blog has taken from me in years. Says No! Oh dear meant to say more than that. So astonishing your blog let me post. Ignore the NO . Too tired in pain to continue. Hope your blog allowed me back. Will try again tomorrow I'm a more coherent msg. Love Maggi UK ❤
ReplyDeleteI figured that was just a very succinct opinion!
DeleteDoes Mr. Moon actually see it as a primary house. It seems like a lot of house for a beach house but certainly has incredible views.
ReplyDeleteWell, as large as it seems to me, there are so many other houses down here that make that one look like servants' quarters. But yes, I agree. At this point we are not considering it as a primary home.
DeleteThe Natural part is magnificent, but I can see where you'd have concerns ab out this being a Vacation Home only used occasionally. It's a lot of House and tho' the abundance in it that is being conveyed is considerable and well maintained, I'm sure it's a lot of Work to keep it that way. As a Maximalist myself, I'd be overwhelmed to inherit someone else's excess and then have the obligation to either maintain it or dispose of it. What you have in your gorgeous Historic Home lines up beautifully with a Home with such History, what you Decorate with and Love is the History of your Beloved Family and that is Priceless and not contrived Decorating, it has Substance. I just LOVE your primary Home, this one, not so much, a Vacay Home I'd want all that Natural Beauty, but something more simplistic too and perhaps more of a Beach Cottage Vibe. This looks like a Primary Residence, and whatever you decide I'm sure you'll have a Peace about. Perhaps look at some other Options and make comparisons?
ReplyDeleteYes! You hit the nail on the head- "contrived" decorating.
DeleteIt could definitely be a primary residence and was. But it is so far from almost everything.
Hoo-boy! No wonder your head and heart are spinning. On the one hand...on the other hand...I trust you and Mr. Moon will come to the right decision for you both without too much sturm und drang.
ReplyDeleteChris from Boise
PS. Speaking of sturm, not to mention drang...hurricane vulnerability? Rising seas?
Everyone who builds or buys or lives on the coast down here just has to accept the realities of wind, rain, and rising seas. That's all there is to it.
DeleteI have a recurring dream that I have bought a house & live there, and forget that there is a whole wing that is still filled with the previous owner's things: hundreds of occillating fans, a Lionel train set and an entire cavernous village, drawers full of papers and forks and ancient Commodore 64s and half-filled mugs of coffee, doors that open into new rooms full of someone else's clothes.
ReplyDeleteThe house is beautiful. And the water! Oh my heart.
When we lived in an apartment that was too small, I used to have dreams that in the furnace room, I discovered a door that, like yours, went to rooms that I didn't even know were there.
DeleteI, too, have had those dreams! Especially when I was living in a tiny trailer with two children. And a husband. "What in the world is behind that door?"
DeleteRamona- you are right. It is undeniably a beautiful house. But do I want it? There is so much to it. I would not be surprised to find a Lionel Train set there and there ARE indeed drawers full of napkins and cutlery and trivets and serving platters and on and on and on and on...
The water and the woods are my favorite.
If I were to buy a house like that I would likely gut it and make it a workshop/studio. It is a good enough house that is true- it has zero appeal for me personally , lacking charm, lacking mystery, is what it is, a house. Rumor has it that the seas are rising...All of those pillows on the sofa might be great floating devices. Mr.Moon is in love with the water, the dock, the fishes that want to jump up onto his lap- and that certainly is a draw but the house looks like just a shiny object- to me. I am difficult.
ReplyDeleteIDEA: turn it into an artists colony and invite me and Linda Sue for long-stay residencies!
DeleteI’m hesitant about the highway though—the trees hid the view but not SOOND. And can a visiting artist walk or bike for fun or to buy potato chips?
*SOUND* (of course)
DeleteWell, I think, Linda Sue, that Mr. Moon is sort of over all of the charm and funk of this house. I mean- he's okay with it but it's my dream house, not his. And in that house he sees a representation of what he has always dreamed. This is just the way of it. The house, in my opinion, does have some charm. The floors and cabinets are beautiful, the ceilings are nice. And the view to the water is amazing.
DeleteAnd as I said above to Chris from Boise, anyone who lives on the coast down here absolutely has to accept the reality of the possibility of hurricanes and rising seas.
Fresca- the highway is only a two lane road and the jungle does buffer some of the sound. As it is now, we live far closer to a railroad track than the house is to the road there.
I like the barnacles on the counter.
DeleteOh it's beautiful isn't it - but I get your hesitancy too! Over here it's like buying a place in the mountains - which sounds wonderful at first, but then you end up not wanting to go there because, well, you've been there so many times, and also simply end up doing two lots of housework. I don't know, but I'm sure you will make the right decision for both of you!
ReplyDeleteI truly hope so, Liz.
DeleteIt looks beautiful, but the non-opening windows would have to be fixed, for me at least.
ReplyDeleteI can understand the over-abundance of things everywhere. People collect things and this is an elderly couple who have lived there, and collected, forever.
Yes. The windows must open. There must be screens.
DeleteBoy are you right about the collecting!
change is scary. i get that part completely. when we were driving out north of our area to get wood we saw many new mcmansions going in and i am thankful my ideals of home and success are in alignment with tony bc there is no way i want to live in a big house, unless we win the lotto and it's smack on a natural lake huron beach with tons of ROCKS (because all the houses built on lake michigan sand dune bluffs will fall in eventually....) would this place be safer from the damage of a hurricane tides???? it's a showplace. you could always make it vacation rental if it's not too much of a drive to do the maintenance. xxalainaxx
ReplyDeleteI am totally in agreement with you about the McMansions and luckily, Glen feels the same way. I would not put this house in that category. It is far simpler and plainer on the outside than that. If we did rent it to vacationers, we would hire a management service. No way I'd put myself in that position. There are many experienced ones in that area.
DeleteAs to hurricane tides- well, the house is built very high up on stilts. Very high. But that is not a guarantee of anything, really.
You'll make the right decision or you'll make the decision right. Either way you'll do what makes sense for you and the family.
ReplyDeleteI loved that. Thank you for that perspective.
DeleteSay YES!
ReplyDeleteWell, there's more to it than that. It's far from a done deal on many levels.
DeleteSusan Z, I do love that. My offering: "If there is magic on this planet, it is contained in water." (Loren Eisley) I have no doubt that you could be happy sitting on the back porch with your martinis watching the waves. It is always the small things that bring you joy. I know this from reading your blogs.
ReplyDeleteYes! It is the small things and this house is such a BIG thing!
DeleteAh, but it is filled with small things.
DeleteThe house looks lovely.It would be quite strange to buy it furnished and keep finding new things you own when you open cupboards and drawers! I would also like the windows to open,though.It's great to have a holiday home for the family.Sorry to sound like a Cassandra,but have you factored in rise in sea level? Wendy SA
ReplyDeleteYes, Wendy. We have factored in sea levels rising but I'm pretty sure in our lifetime, at least, that house will still be dry. It's fairly high up on a lot and it's built on stilts. Hurricanes now- that's a different story.
DeleteAll of those docks...I think I would like it more secluded but not far from shopping. Is that possible? You guys will figure it out, you always do!
ReplyDeleteYou can't really see any nearby houses from the house. The jungly woods prevent that. And honestly, not many people spend all their time in their houses on the coast.
Deleteyou know, all good adventures come with hesitation. still I understand what you are saying.
ReplyDeleteI think I feel paralyzed more than hesitant!
Deleteoof, mary, it's a beautiful house. you could set up a home goods and decor shop with most of its contents and still have everything left that you need. I suspect the kids will be instrumental in the ultimate decision on this. good luck my friend. you have a happy problem on your hands, but a problem is a problem, regardless. whatever happens, all will be well.
ReplyDeleteGood Lord! You are so right about the home goods and decor shop. I swear- there are at least three shops' worth of stuff in there. The kids are all for it because- of course!
Deletethat is a looooong dock out into the water. and this house is on an island if it's on the bay? how can it be bay if it's on the coast? it is a big house. a lot of house to take care of, a very nice house but all I can think about is the upkeep though if it's closed up most the time maybe not too bad. and the wild surroundings, also wonderful. a lot of work to get rid of the stuff that you don't care for but Mary, I laughed when you wrote "There is an overabundance of things in this house. Whoever decorated it never met a surface or wall she did not want to cover." have you never met you?
ReplyDeleteanyway, I suppose it's a good investment and I guess you could even use it for airB&B when you know you or the fam won't be using it. it may not be funky town yet but then you haven't put hour hand to it yet.
your hand
DeleteNo. It's not an island. If you google earth Lanark Village, FL, and head west from there a bit, you can actually almost see it. Well, you probably can but I can't identify it. But you can get an idea of what that area looks like.
ReplyDeleteAnd you are right about me putting stuff up on walls but there ARE blank walls in my house and blank spaces whereas there is not wall left undecorated in this house. Each wall has a plethora of stuff. There are more lamps alone in that house than I've ever seen one place in my life.
How would you feel about the house if it were empty?
ReplyDeletePerhaps you could tell the sellers they have to be responsible (pay) for it to be cleared. (There are companies that do that .) That’s a reasonable request.
Taking on all the stuff of a dying person seems … a big ask.
That is such a good question. I would be totally overwhelmed at the thought of furnishing an entire house. I doubt I could do it.
DeleteI guess it's just the overabundance of things in the house that is so daunting. Three full junk drawers (at least?) that I found. Big drawers. I have thought about the clearing company avenue. I know nothing about that. And at this point, it's all very much up in the air.
Good grief ... If you and Glen go for this place ... Have a Moving in Sale and unload most of what you wouldn't want to keep and donate anything else to a resale shop!
DeleteMarcia: you’re missing the point here.
DeleteOur last two houses have been filled with the detritus of other's lives. I find it fascinating. But here's the dealio. I look at a lot of that 'detritus' in your potential home, and it is top of the line crap. You could get big money for that. Start pulling stuff out into the yard, I'll bet you could make back some money. In our last house, I found a pearl necklace tucked in the back of a china closet, in an envelope.
DeleteMarcia- the problem with all the "things" is more complicated than that. For one thing, removing and hauling all of those things either down the stairs or in a very small elevator is a daunting proposition. The resale shop idea is not bad. I am not sure if there's one in the area that handles that sort of thing. There may be. But trust me- there are truckloads and truckloads of things.
DeleteDebby- Yes. That's the thing. This stuff is "good" stuff. Not fine art, but worth far more than just junk. There would not be much use in a yard sale- very, very few people live in that area permanently. Most of the traffic going by the house is definitely on their way to or from the beach for the day. But yes, there is an element of treasure finding, isn't there?
You talk to someone with a second hand store, maybe?
DeleteOh wow - I can actually comment! I still always read.
ReplyDeleteWe are moving and in so many ways, I learn again and again how uncomfortable I am with “excess.” It’s an odd feeling. That may be what you are feeling too. If it feels extravagant, it’s like I think I don’t deserve it. Anyway - love you. Stephanie/SJ
Oh, honey! I'm so glad to see you here! You're moving? Not easy with a little man to take care of too. And a job. I don't know how you do it. I love your word choice- "excess". Exactly. You nailed it. I am not only uncomfortable with it, I hate it.
DeleteI sure do love you, darling.