Friday, June 28, 2024

All The Emotions


I sent this man off an hour ago to head to the coast to hopefully go fishing on the gulf tomorrow. That's how he wants to spend his birthday which is no big surprise to me. He found that picture in his memories the other day and sent it to me and Jessie and it perfectly represents the true way he holds and enfolds all of us. And the way he loves with all of himself. And of course, the way he is loved back.

I am feeling raw this evening. I got an e-mail from a reader who lost her husband just a few days ago and my heart broke for her. Mr. Moon and I have been especially tender and loving these past few days. You know how relationships are. I always say that sometimes the tide is in and sometimes the tide is out. Sometimes the moon is full and sometimes it's just a tiny crescent. But the moon and the water are assuredly still all there, even when it appears that they are not, but oh, it is glorious when we see them in fullness. And as we grow older and the fact of our mortality becomes more and more real as I said yesterday, I think we become more careful and cherishing in our love for each other. At least, that is how it seems to be for us. Certainly for me. 

Look at this.


That is Tom's tiny house and if you will notice- the lights are on. So is the air-conditioning, according to Glen. The water is hooked up, the hot water heater too. The refrigerator is running. He even found an old antenna set to go on Tom's TV so that he can get local channels as he has no internet or cable. It is all ready for Tom to move into. Glen was up and out, working on it all before I even woke up this morning. He wanted so badly to finish it before he left to go fishing. 

And he did it. 

It is not just the fact that we are getting older that makes me respect and cherish this man more, it is the way he continues to show me what he is made of and he can still surprise me with that. 

So. I am feeling raw too because of last night's debate. You all know what I am talking about. I so hate to say this but Biden appeared so frail, so unsure of himself at times, and so, well- let's face it- old. 
Yes. He had a cold. Yes. He has a stutter. Yes. He is 81 years old but shit, Mick Jagger will be 81 next month and let us just say that Biden is not making us say, "Wow! I can't believe he's 81!" 
The debate was poorly moderated. No fact checking and of course everything out of Trump's mouth was a lie. He is the greatest, his four years of being president were the greatest four years in the history of the US. He is the best golf player. He did not fuck a porn star. Illegals from prisons and mental institutions are swarming across the border, taking all the "Black jobs" and sucking our country dry. In some states, abortion after the delivery of a full term baby is legal. It was never-ending. 
All of what I just said is true. 
But this is also true- his followers do not care. They already know that he is a con man, a liar, a convicted felon, a man who has no morals or scruples or empathy or concern about anyone but himself. They know it but they love that about him. They have convinced themselves that he is worthy of their undying support as surely as they have convinced themselves that he is their god's one, true choice to lead our country. 
They are in a cult and he is their leader. 
And what about those who are still unsure which way they want to vote? 
Well, to my mind if you are still undecided as to who the better candidate is, then you're obviously as delusional as the people wearing Maga Hats, American flag shirts, and adult diapers outside your clothing holding signs that say, "Real men wear diapers."

I, as so many other people, would vote for a steaming pile of a yellow dog's shit before I'd vote for Trump. But are there enough of us? 
I don't know. What I do know is that Glen and I both sat in front of the TV last night, absolutely devastated. I wanted to knit as I watched but ended up merely trying to untangle a ball of yarn. Finally, I got up and said, "That's enough. I'm going to bed."
And then I did. 

I got out into the garden this morning and I weeded in the sun and the heat until I was running with sweat, trying to purify myself, I suppose. I came in to eat my lunch and it began to rain which is only a blessing in this time and season. I sat on the back porch and listened to the wind as it gusted. Somewhere in the yard there's a tree that has a branch that cracked and then cracked again, but I never heard a fall. 

Tomorrow I am hopefully going to spend time with Lily and Lauren and the kids and maybe Hank and Rachel too. We shall see. And I will be making a German chocolate cake for that good man. I hope that he has a wonderful time tonight with his buddies, drinking whiskey, going out to eat, laughing and telling stories and will come home to me, seventy years old, as handsome as ever, more precious than I ever could have imagined when I was the twenty-nine year old woman who met and fell in love with him. 

I suppose I should tell you that yes, my bed has clean sheets on it and that I am sipping a martini. Life goes on. 

Happy Friday, y'all. Or at least as happy as it can be. Here's what one of my oldest friends wrote to me this morning after I'd written him the terse message, "We are fucked."
He said, "I take some hope in that there are several months and numerous possibilities."
I am trying to do the same. 


Love...Ms. Moon


43 comments:

  1. I had no intention of watching the debate, but accidentally caught about fifteen seconds of Biden and it was exactly what I’d been praying not to see. When it was over, my husband emerged from the den looking as we all did on election night 2016. Margaret

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  2. Hold steady, as Dan Rather says. Be steady, hold on. It's months to election. Biden is the good and honest candidate. Do not despair.
    Happy birthday, Mr. Moon. Your tiny house is ginormously wonderful.

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    1. I am afraid I lost my faith in the American people and goodness and honesty when Trump got elected over Hilary. But I will hold steady. What else can we do?
      Isn't that tiny house just the cutest?

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  3. I tried to be non judgmental and open as we turned TV on.....but ended up totally shaken and disillusioned afterwards. Joe was look frail and not as strong as usual...made me sad, and you know who, of course, was his normal over inflated self who would not address a question if his ego depended on it. It shook me to my core. I'm still reeling from it all. I DO wish Mr Moon a happy 70th with fishing, a most loving wife and family, and a cake to live for!
    Susan M

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    1. It was a depressing ninety minutes. But, as Joanne said above, there is a lot of time between now and November. We just have to keep faith, I guess, if we possibly can.
      Thanks for the birthday wishes!

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  4. From everything I have been reading both last night and then all day today ... I would say there is a tremendous blue wave forming! Just because of one bad performance, the whole thing is not to be trashed. There is another debate later on and, goddess willing, Joe will be healthy and more then ready to do battle with the Orange lying bastard!
    I can't believe the people who want to throw Joe Biden to the dogs!
    I will be 81 in August and I am damned sure not ready for the garbage heap yet!
    Oh, yes ... the tiny house is so cute!

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    1. Where have you been reading about a blue wave? I'd like to see some of that news!
      I don't think anyone wants to throw Biden to the dogs but his debate performance did nothing at all to rest people's fears about his age and capability. Why no one talks about Trump's capability is a cruel mystery to me.

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  5. I didn't watch because one second of that hateful mug would ruin my night. But of course I read about the aftermath with a heavy heart. As Joanne said we have months to go. And in the meantime we can all watch the Supreme Court show their corruption.

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    1. The news from the Supreme Court is overwhelmingly horrible and terrifying, isn't it?

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  6. It was devastating. He has done a spectacular job in the last four years and should get out while he is still breathing. I never thought I would say it but it is time. I am trying to trust the party to explore options.

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    1. I really do not know what the options would be at this point. Changing horses in midstream just seems impossible. I am just hoping with all my heart that Joe makes a strong comeback.

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  7. I felt badly for JB during the debate when he wobbled a bit. That said, he is still clearly the better man and I believe this will carry true. He will surround himself with the best minds and strategists and he will undoubtedly do a fantastic job as President of the US. We need JB. Happy B-day to Glen. I hope he has fun fishing with his buddies. The German chocolate cake will signal party #2. The Tiny House looks superb.

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    1. Of course Joe is the better man! But I felt that he did more than wobble. He struggled. I know a lot of that was the pressure making his stutter worse but it did not look good. Still, we do need him.
      I hope Glen's had fun too. I haven't heard from him yet today and so of course I'm a tiny bit concerned because that is how I am. I'm sure he's fine.
      Isn't that a darling house?

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  8. I think millions of us felt the same way as you did last evening. Joe did look old, he is 81 ffs. But he is a good man and he is surrounded by good competent people and he gets shit done! It is true the optics were bad, and Tapper and Bash were worthless, they let that orange buffoon lie his ass off all night with no pushback. TBH I don't think Trump did that well either, never answered a question, pivoted, spewed lies & gibberish. I'll leave you with this from Heather Cox Richardson. It helped me a bit, maybe it will you as well. https://heathercoxrichardson.substack.com/p/june-27-2024

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    1. I read that, Jim and I agree with everything she said but none of that takes away from the fact that Biden just really diid not look good. I don't think Trump did well at all. Unless by doing well we mean lying with all of the confidence and assurance of a sociopath.

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  9. Sadly I think you are correct. Enjoy your evening.

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  10. Do not stop hoping and working. What is everyone doing to ensure the election goes Democrat? Voting isn't enough. Whining is a negative. Help get out the vote. Support your candidates up and down the ballot. Especially in Florida, where every single election now has a democratic candidate. No more unopposed elections!
    I understand the need to cry a bit. But then we get up, we don't undermine Joe and Kamala, we do the work.
    That's my bit!

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    1. I agree with what you said, Liz. I do not think that most of us are whining though. I think we are grieving. Of course I support Joe and Kamala and absolutely all the Democrats. I also think I've been beat down. Living in Florida for the last how many years has sucked the juice out of my soul when it comes to politics. Have you seen that DeSantis has vetoed all funding to arts grants in the state because a small percentage of it was going to fringe art things that MAY HAVE HAD DRAG QUEENS IN THEM? This is the world I live in now. As when Trump was president, every time I think that things could not possibly get worse, they do.
      I wish I had your spirit.

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  12. Yes, place your hopes in the several months and numerous possibilities. I watched the news last night and all they showed of the debate was the back and forth insults and the few seconds where Biden was completely blank faced not remembering what to say. I wondered if the insults had derailed him, since surely they weren't a planned part of the speeches?
    I hope Mr Moon has a wonderful time fishing and comes home safe and sound.
    The picture where he is holding August is so sweet.

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    1. Oh, Biden knew there would be insults. That is just the way Trump rolls. No. It was more than that.
      Isn't that the sweetest picture in the world?

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  13. I am feeling mostly anger about the debate and about Biden's candidacy. I'm disgusted that the Democratic party has put us in this position. But he has my vote, a thousand percent. (And although the debate was poorly moderated, I've read that some supposedly independent voters were put off by Trump's lies and bombast. Let's hope that's the case for lots of people.)

    Mr Moon is indeed a wonder. I'm so glad the tiny house is done!

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    1. I have seen some numbers indicating that undecided voters were not at all impressed with Trump. I think you're quite right about how the Democratic part has failed regarding a candidate. But look at the Republicans- they are joyfully running a convicted felon, sex offender, liar, conman, and overall idiot. And it's working for them.

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  14. I looked forward to reading your take on the TV debate and I was not disappointed. You saw it for what it was. Here in faraway England I stayed up very late to watch the debate live and I found it excruciating to see Joe Biden in that state of mind - rather lost. How will he be when he is eighty five? In my opinion, it is time for The Democratic Party to take decisive action before it is too late. The answer is probably Gavin Newsom - if he wants it.

    I am glad to see that Glen has completed his work on Tom's tiny house and Happy Birthday to him!

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    1. As I have said, I don't see how we could switch horses in this midstream. I think that Newsom will have his day but I don't think it's now.I don't know. If I've ever in my life thought, "I don't know shit," this would be it.
      I'm so proud of Glen for the word he's done on that house.

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  15. The debate was infuriating. How can that thing even be in the running? I would vote for Biden against Trump no matter what, but why couldn’t the Democrats have done better. I’ve known so many couples who don’t get more loving and tender as they get older. Such a shame.

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    1. My main emotion watching the debate was grief. And sadness. It was so overwhelmingly hard to watch.
      Some couples do seem like they are more cell mates serving a life sentence together than sweethearts as they age. And it IS a shame.

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  16. I'll be voting Biden all the way - but - are these 2 individuals really the best the 2 parties can come up with? I'm worrying about all the younger people who looked at that debate as a clash between 2 doddering grandpas - one fragile, and the other a total blowhard (not to mention liar, convicted felon, asshat and digusting jerk). It's not looking good.

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    1. I agree with you. My god. I remember when my generation believed that we should never trust anyone over thirty and here we are. Okay, both Trump and Biden are older than I am but not by a great much and I am looking at them with such confusion. How did these guys become our candidates? And don't get me wrong- I love Biden and support him fully but...

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  17. Poor Biden reminded me of old patients with Parkinsons. His face had virtually no movement and he looked like a very old man. He had no vigour. Trump of course just looked like a steaming pile of shit, most of it spewing forth out of his mouth. I have noticed lately though his hair has taken on a pale green tinge when the light hits it just right. New dye?

    I'm glad Mr. Moon is having a lovely birthday.
    It was my last day of work yesterday. It was a shit show and reinforced my decision to retire.
    Sending hugs to you.

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    1. Yes. I too thought of Parkinson's.
      It was so very sad.
      As to Trump's hair- all I can say about that shit is...ugh.

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    2. Also-I am interested in reading about how your last day at work went.

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  18. Trump is a master at gas lighting and Biden fell right into it. Christ- he should have known better- but - he is a ghost, a waxen figure, confused and tired- We should not have to put him though that- it is brutal. If he had chosen a better running mate i would say let him go and let the mate take over- BUT! That is not the case. i agree with you "we are fucked" - Dennis on the other hand refuses to believe that americans are so stupid as to vote for fascist theocracy- the madness of the Rump! He remains optimistic.

    Your Glen is such an incredible person. At age 70 he has more verve than a 20 year old and is equally as handsome!
    Life does go on, Dear Mary- there are beans to be harvested and jarred...there are grand kids to be squeezed...live in the moment is the best thing we can do. Vote blue is the only thing we can do.

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    1. I am really not sure at all how Harris would do if she was given the job of replacing Jo. She hasn't gotten much chance to show her stuff.
      I think that Dennis is slightly overly optimistic. I mean- Americans voted the shit in before. I hope he's not.
      Yep. All of us have to get on with our lives, don't we? And of course...vote blue.

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  19. I'm voting blue no matter what. I was saddened by the debate but Biden is a thousand times better than the alternative.

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  20. I voted for Biden and will again. So many asking how he got the nomination four yrs ago. He was going nowhere in the primaries until James Cliburn made a statement right before the SC primary and that was when it happened. He wouldn’t have been my first choice - Elizabeth Warren, Kamala Harris, and Amy Klobachar were in there and I would love to see one of them on that debate stage Thursday night. MS Nell

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  21. P.S. And Bernie and Mayor Pete and Michael Bennett. Ms Nell
    Sorry, someone else brought it up. Not me. 😁

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  22. 37paddington: I was as devastated as you were. Those “we are fucked” messages were streaming into my texts too. But you know what? The choice is clear. Two men are running for president. One is a good man. One is a bad man. Vote for the good man. And if it becomes necessary to think of it this way, vote AGAINST the bad man. I’ll vote blue no matter who.

    More importantly, happy birthday to your wonderful man!

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Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.