It has just been the prettiest day. The light has been splendid, whether pouring into the house through windows or shining through magnolia leaves or just being there, lighting up the tiny part of the world I live in, showing the bluest sky and the whitest wisps of clouds to their best advantage.
It's been a wonder.
And cool. All day long. Perfection.
Knowing that my alone-time is coming to an end, I've cherished it all the more today. As I just wrote to Billy in a text, I wander around this house that I love so much thinking, "And here are my books, and here is my cozy bed, and this is my pretty bathroom and this is my rooster on the wall..."
I think it has been a time of deep gratitude for me, this past week. It is easy to see and contemplate the most simple of pleasures and sweetness when there is nothing to distract me, no reason to make me rush from one thing to another.
But soon the man will be home and my life will change back to being a bit more scheduled and a lot more full of conversation. And that is good, too.
My late-blooming roses are still kicking ass. I picked these today.
This is really quite sad, in a way, but I think I have mentioned a book of hers that I have, called The Care and Feeding of Children which is filled with stern instructions about showing too much affection to a child or passing germs by kissing. I guess...I guess...she took that to heart. I feel sorry for her children, I feel sorry for her. To think that kissing my child would cause weakness or illness in them? My god. I practically ingested my children. They are lucky I did not kiss the skin right off them.
I try not to invade the space of my grandchildren when it comes to hugs and kisses. Lily's kids are big huggers and give and receive kisses easily. August and Levon are a bit more reticent about the whole thing. Still, I can't help sometimes kamakazing in on them and delivering swift pecks to the tops of their heads. Yesterday, when I was telling them good-bye, August pursed his little lips which I took as a sign he would allow a kiss, and I gave him the briefest, dry brush of lips and then he said, "Too juicy!"
I laughed so hard. That was the least juicy kiss in the history of kisses.
Where was I? Oh yes. Roses, and my grandmother's skin.
Well.
Gladly. More for me!
good to have down time when ones partner/spouse is gone...having nothing *on schedule* is a sublime treasure. I always find I have SO much free time....and think *really? this is how much time I normally devote to keeping the wheels of our life going*? My eye immediately drawn to the jadeite mug your roses are in...... love that stuff and it is *so* collectible and nowadays impossible to find. Time to *hop-to* and get our turkey/black bean tacos rolling.....hope you enjoy another meal of peas...... and perhaps sourdough bread? would be enough for me LOL
ReplyDeleteSusan M
It's true, Susan. We do spend a lot of time keeping this party going, don't we?
DeleteI believe that jadeite is a reproduction, not old or original. It's actually a little pitcher. I love the color of it.
There will be peas with my supper tonight but I need to feed my sourdough before I make another loaf of bread from it.
Such a lovely day.
ReplyDeleteAbout touch, I grew up in an almost completely non touch culture. I would give my mother a little kiss when I was going to the uni for months, and she didn't mind, but didn't reciprocate.
When I tried to hug an older brother or sister, particularly Irene, I'd be pushed away as if it was wrong. So I left them alone. I didn't particularly want touch, it's not easy for a neuro divergent person, which I think my family in general is.
I just tried it out.
So it's not sad and terrible if it's not a pleasant experience. It's just a fact. We need to remember people are different in their needs. If someone clearly wants a hug, I'll hug. But I have a very low need for touch. It works if families have matching needs, but I wouldn't have done well with a huggy mom!
You make such an excellent point here! People ARE very different in their needs and I do respect that. I generally ask the boys if they would like a kiss or a a hug. August is easier with that and often opens his arms or purses his lips without being asked. Levon saves his lovin' mostly for his mama and his daddy.
DeleteSomehow, with my grandmother, I fell that she was somehow "trained" out of touch. My grandfather, her husband, was absolutely not one to touch. If I ever saw them touch, I don't remember it. When it came time for him to tell us goodnight, he would rub his whiskery cheek on ours which, although not exactly pleasant, I did treasure. I guess I craved touch from a young age. But Granny? I think a lot was trained out of her. I just have that feeling.
I am in love with your hanging rooting bottle and the way it goes down to that hanging pot. I have studied it carefully and cannot figure it out, but I have decided that I'm going to invent me one just as soon as I figure out what to use for wire.
ReplyDeleteThat's an illusion, Debby! I am going to post two pictures this evening of what it really likes like. There are two separate vessels there for sure. And I have used a strong string for the bottom pot.
DeleteLate roses seem to be more luscious than early ones. As if they know their time is almost at an end and want you to remember them over winter.
ReplyDeleteMy family was stiff upper lip English and affection was not forthcoming. I married a Pole where emotions were everywhere. Now THAT was an interesting experience!
I think you're right about the late roses. They just give it their all!
DeleteOh my goodness- you must have been completely overwhelmed when you married into that family! There were probably big misunderstandings on both sides.
The roses look so wonderful I can almost smell them. I am hesitant with hugs and kisses because I have memories of my mother's smothering hugs whether you wanted a hug or not and she was always right there in your face wanting to know every little detail of everything you said and did, then there was the "why?" Why did you do this or that? my kids didn't like all of that either and I have no wish to to pass that on to my own grandchildren. I'm not a big fan of kissing either because of the germs thing, so I'll kiss the babies heads and cheeks but once they start turning away or saying no, I'll stop.
ReplyDeleteDifferent families certainly have different ways of showing affection. Your mother sounds a bit...smothering, I must say. I would hate having someone want to know every detail of my life and kissing me all the time either. I really don't think I'm THAT bad.
DeleteAnd I would never, ever kiss a child or anyone who said "no." Absolutely would not do that.
I think she was trying to make up for lost time, which I couldn't see back then but now when I look back..well she wasn't wanted by her own mother and then she left home with my siblings when I was seven. So when I went to live with her at 16 she suddenly wanted to be "mummy" and I just couldn't give her that. Then when I had kids she wanted to be the much-loved grandma and my kids felt suffocated every time we visited her.
DeleteI think that generation of parents were taught not to show affection. It would be a bit like covering table legs during the Victorian era in case women became faint. My grandma was a cold fish anyway and my mom swore she would never be like that. She was a much warmer version of her mom and I'm a warmer version of her, so I believe it's heading in the right direction!
ReplyDeleteThat's a sweet story. I'm glad that things are warming up with the generations!
Deleteborder grass, you mean monkey grass or lariope? my mother was not affectionate, didn't like to be touched or crowded. I was very affectionate with my kids. apparently my daughter and son in law are not affectionate and my grandkids were teens before they would willingly accept hugs and kisses and even begin to return hugs. I would do it anyway. except for Robin. she was a kissy baby and the most huggy.
ReplyDeleteI made that roasted cauliflower last Friday.
From what I'm reading, Ellen, what we have here is Mondo grass, aka Monkey grass, or dwarf Mondo. It is thinner than Lariope. I just found out that it is sometimes used in aquariums! I thought it looked just like that stuff!
DeleteI guess that everyone has a different feeling about the level of physical affection they are comfortable with.
God, I love that recipe.
I've just about given up on pulling weeds in my garden beds. I'm waiting for the frost to come and I hope it kills some of them off. Of course, it doesn't often work that way as weeds can be so hearty!
ReplyDeleteGlad you have enjoyed your week with Mr. Moon gone. I know you will be happy to see him.
It never freezes hard enough here to kill the invasive plants I hate so much. The roots refuse to die.
DeleteI will be happy to see Mr. Moon for sure.
Yay on the ginger
ReplyDeleteI know!
DeleteI'm so jealous of your ginger flower! That's one plant that just did not succeed for me. Apparently ours had some kind of virus.
ReplyDelete"Too juicy" -- ha! That's hilarious. I do remember my stepmother used to kiss us on the lips and I thought it was disgusting. My mom was a cheek-kisser, so I complained to my dad and then my stepmother began kissing us on the cheeks too. Overall we were not an extremely huggy, kissy family but my grandmother did kiss on the cheek as well. Hello and goodbye -- so twice every visit!
Try the ginger again. No matter how deep I tried to plant this root, it just kept coming back up to the surface. I have no idea why but it's got some nice fronds on it.
DeleteIt's funny- I don't usually ever kiss the kiddlets on the lips but August will purse his for a kiss on them so I give him a little peck. "Too juicy" just cracked me up. That boy.
Somehow I can totally believe that your family wasn't big on physical affection.
Your stepmother at least took your feelings into consideration, I guess. Jeez.
Sorry hit publish too soon. You’ve had the best day!
ReplyDeleteXoxo
Barbara
It was!
Delete37paddington: what a lovely, thought provoking, peaceful post. I am one for touch and fortunately I came up in a family of huggers but yes, it’s important to respect people’s boundaries, especially children’s. Honestly though? For me, heaven is hugging my children.
ReplyDelete