Don't Read This If You're Already Depressed

Well, there's the first azalea blossom to open in my yard. It's way too early for them here. At least that variety. I saw it on my way out to the compost pile. I know a lot of people don't especially like that color of azaleas. It's an old variety and one that was planted in multitudes in this area for years and years. But I like it. I mean- that's one hell of a rich color. It's almost screamy. 

I took another walk today. Blah, blah, blah. I really need to broaden my walking routes. There aren't that many directly around here and I have walked all of them hundreds of times. There's a new park that's probably not more than six or seven miles from here that I could easily drive to that's part of a greenway project that stretches many miles over the Tallahassee area. 
I've been watching them build the entranceway with the playground and various shelters for a long time but it's open now and I should just drive over there and see what it's like. There's another part of the trail that's not too far from me but it has so little shade that in summer it's a sort of living hell and, unusually for me, I don't feel safe on that trail for some reason. 
The thing about walking I've always loved is that you don't have to drive anywhere to do it. You put on your shoes, you walk out the door. You have begun. But perhaps it's time for me to expand my horizons a bit. It just seems wasteful to drive to a place to walk but I know that's silly. If the state of Florida wants to give me some nice trails out in nature, I should at least explore the possibilities. 

Maybe tomorrow. Maybe not. 

So it's New Year's Eve. I can't remember the last time I celebrated that particular human-invented moment when one year becomes another. 
Maybe it was the Y2K NYE. I was pretty sure that planes would not be dropping from the sky nor would the electrical grid suddenly splutter out, but hey! Who knew?
So I made Mr. Moon take me out to a fancy bar and as I recall, I dressed in my best velvet finery and heels and nice jewelry and sparkling eye-shadow so we could have a martini. I think I'd seen a movie with that scenario in it for New Year's Eve and it looked so Bette Davis, so Cary Grant, so sophisticated and festive and hell, if the world was coming to an end, why not? 
But after our martini I asked him to take me home so that if the world did indeed end, we'd be with the children when it did. 

Speaking of husband, I spoke with mine last night. He was actually going to go sit in a deer stand today. Or at least that was his plan. And he's having New Year's with the family of his old friend with whom he's staying. I suppose he may be coming home tomorrow but who knows? Perhaps he has decided to move back to Tennessee without telling me. 
I hope not. He claims to still love me and I believe him except for that small part of me which will never feel good enough or adequate or deserving or...oh, whatever. You'd think I'd be over that unhealthy thinking by now but if so, you'd be wrong. 

I did a little more weeding in the garden today and cut back the basils, both Mexican and Thai, that gave me and the bees so much pleasure this summer. I seriously doubt they'll sprout this coming spring but I left the roots and a bit of the limbs. The rest just all went brown and dry in the freeze we had. 

Here it all is, ready to go on the burn pile. I thought about breaking it up into smaller pieces and giving it to Mr. Moon to use on a fire to cook chicken on or something. That might be a nice use of it. Might be pretty tasty chicken. Or maybe not. 

I discovered that my turnips are bulbing. Nice. I'll be cooking black-eyed peas and rice tomorrow for the traditional New Year's Day meal and I'll make greens to go with it. I do love to slice up turnips to go in the pot with them. 

I do not set a great deal of store, or any, really, on the magic of New Years. Like I said, it's just a human construction that we've chosen to celebrate in order to give ourselves a sort of reset button. And to drink and make loud noises and kiss strangers. At least that's what the movies tell us. 

But you know- tomorrow it will be 2025. It just occurred to me a few days ago that this means that we've already used up twenty-five percent of the 21st century. That blew my mind. When I was a child the idea of living in a time when the date started out with a two and a zero was not even conceivable. And here we are- a quarter of a century past that. It is certainly not beyond imagination that my grandchildren will be living in the 22nd century. 

And WHERE ARE THE FLYING CARS? WE WERE PROMISED FLYING CARS! AND JET-PACKS! 

I suppose I'll go make my supper now. I'm almost ashamed to show you what I made last night but the green peas factor is so funny that I will. 

I made myself a little pot roast with potatoes and green beans and carrots and onions and...baby peas. 

It was so good. I ain't gonna lie.

Happy New Year, y'all. For what that's worth. Let's just say I do not have great expectations for what 2025 is going to be like for us here in the USA. 

I truly hope I am wrong.

Love...Ms. Moon