Friday, April 7, 2023

In Which I Get Just A Little Bit Bitchy

Here's a picture of Maggie that Lily sent in a group text yesterday and I was going to post it but I forgot because I felt poorly. I do realize that's a grammatical error. I have to tell you that people who lose their shit over grammatical errors bug me. Around here, "feeling poorly" does not mean you are no good at feeling things. It means you're under the weather.
But back to the grammar police. 
I remember one time I was with a group of women and one of them said, "I could never date a guy who ended his sentences in a preposition." 
"Really?" I asked. "My husband wouldn't know a preposition if one jumped over the fence and bit him but I've never met a better man in my life."
And it's true. When we judge someone because their grammar isn't perfect (and really- who's is?) we are absolutely ignoring so many factors such as where the person was raised, who the person was raised by, what the educational system was like where they grew up, what the culture was, what emphasis was put on things like grammar? Mr. Moon's dad had to quit school in something like the sixth grade because he needed to start earning money. He probably worked on a farm. His mother was a single mother who ran her own business, making brooms. Making brooms, y'all! In a barn! Did she and her three children feel the need to make sure their English was perfect?
I doubt it. 
They were probably far more interested in making sure there was enough to eat and a roof over their heads. 
I loved the way Glen's mom and dad talked. They were country and it was beautiful. His mama had so many different phrases that she used that I'd never heard before or since and I use them myself now. When anyone would get sick she'd caution them to take it easy and truly recover because if you didn't, the illness would "go back on you." Her doctor knew her from "A to Izzard." She called lactating breasts "dinners." 
Instead of feeling all superior around her and Mr. Moon's daddy, I felt honored to be around people who were so very much themselves in every way and who were so loving and accepting and giving. They had a lot to teach me and grammar played no part in any of it. 

So I guess you could say that instead of judging people on their grammar, I judge people who judge people for their grammar. 

Phew. Didn't mean to go off on that tangent but I did. 

The picture of Maggie shows her wearing the unicorn costume her mama made her for Unicorn Day at school where the children were invited to dress up if they wanted. Of course she didn't tell Lily until 6 p.m. the evening before. But Lily, with her skill, talent, imagination, stash of craft items, and Maggie's already heavily unicorn-themed wardrobe, was able to create that magnificence in time for school the next morning. She's amazing. 

I knew I had to get to town today to get everything I needed for Sunday's gathering so I did my chores early-ish. Once again I got seduced and distracted by the fat, purple berries on the mulberry tree and picked another gallon. This is how many berries I have in my refrigerator now:

I should have put something in the picture for scale. That orange vintage Tupperware will only fit on the top shelf of my refrigerator due to its height and the less-vintage, clear Tupperware on the right holds the same amount if not more. 
I just cannot seem to let those berries go to waste. 

I washed sheets and towels and other laundry, went to the dump, all that regular stuff. And then I went to Costco where Brenda was set up selling sunglasses and she looked especially gorgeous today. She says she's good at selling sunglasses which is why they put her there and I am sure she is. I asked her if she gets a commission and she said she did not but she was okay with that. Selling sunglasses is easier than stocking the dairy room, I'm sure. She hugged me and I got teary-eyed. 
"I love you," she said, and I said, "You are a light on this earth."

Although Costco was filled with people, I got in and out pretty quickly. I did not get bogged down wondering if I should buy kilos of jelly beans or vats of spinach and artichoke dip although I would love a vat of spinach and artichoke dip and would eat half of it myself. Which is why I don't buy it. 
And then I went to Publix and that took longer because it just takes me forever to get out of there. I finally did, came home, unloaded the car, put everything away, dealt with laundry, made up the bed, and started spaghetti sauce for our supper. 
Hurray! I feel like a champion! 
Or something. 

I am feeling much better today although not 100%. It's odd. When I don't eat, my stomach starts hurting a little but I really don't have much of an appetite. I'm sure I've lost at least twenty or thirty pounds, right? 

And so it's Friday and Good Friday, in fact. Happy Day They Crucified Our Lord. 
It is just such a mystery to me why Christians have made the murder of their supposed savior into a sacred day. 
I mean- sure- I get it. Jesus had to die to save us from our sins and that's why his dad, GOD, sent him down here to be born from a virgin in the first place so his cruel death has great and huge meaning and by his suffering we are saved and so on and so forth but then not only did he get resurrected, which I do not begrudge him for at all, but what in hell was his death really worth when you consider all the rules that Christian churches give you to follow or else you'll go to hell or whatever? Obviously, he did not save us from our sins so what's the point? 
I'm sorry. I am just so over all the myths and churches making money off the poor and shaming people for being human beings who do human things and complete hypocrites showing their supposed devotion by wearing crosses around their necks and dangling from their ears. 
As Tom Robbins said once, if the Jesus story had happened in our day, we'd all be wearing gold electric chairs on gold chains. 

But yeah, whatever. 

Martini time. 

Happy Friday, y'all. 

Love...Ms. Moon


  1. grammar *police* are annoying.....Mulberries are good, Maggie is divine in her Lily and Lauren created outfit....... and *good* Friday to you........ (and only in the sense of clean sheets and Martinis, which I hope your stomach can handle!). I look back now and LOL at what we were *taught* in Sunday school as children.....Lazarus pulling away the stone and revealing an empty chamber.......resurrection! Oh my........... not for me!
    Susan M

  2. Happy Friday and martini time, Ms. Moon! Magnolia looks awesome, what a great costume made in such a short time! I totally agree with you about grammar and the way people speak- it’s so beautiful! I can spot a typo in a second, but it doesn’t bother me😅(Your writing is beautiful, by the way!) I envy you all those gorgeous mulberries… I knit with mulberry silk sometimes and it’s beautiful! Have a lovely Easter weekend with your family🤗Xo, Rigmor

  3. Those mulberries are beautiful! You will do them justice. Maggie is too lovely, and so lucky with wonderful mothers. Have a wonderful feast with family, come Sunday.

  4. Maggie can be well pleased that she has a mom who can locate a real unicorn horn in the blink of an eye. Magic Mom.
    Grammar can make me crazy and grates on my nerves like fingernails scraping a chalk board but NOT if the grammar is regional/cultural/ - what folks say is more important than how they say it- my
    Dad had poor grammar, he knew better but it was used to fit in with his fellows for the most part- And to annoy me and my mother- take us down a peg or two. He would say the most intelligent/loving things using his "fellows" grammar and leave us with a "who the hell do we think we are" humility smack down. I loved that! It don't matter....

  5. Judging anyone by their grammar completely ignores everything good about that person, so the judgy person probably doesn't have that many friends. Maggie is a beautiful unicorn! I love my Tupperware, though most pieces are small and hold individual portions of soup or whatever in my freezer. Have you thought about making mulberry wine?

  6. I trained as a translator and to me good grammar was important - but only in official documents. It makes them so much easier to translate! And I was lucky enough to have an extremely strict English teacher who insisted on it. That being said, people don't talk like that and in non-formal documents they don't write like that so it is nonsense to insist on it (as Churchill is supposed to have said, "it is a situation, up with which I will not put")! It's like accents. We have so many in the UK and for the longest time TV presenters only spoke "the Queen's English" (uuugghhh) until eventually someone realized that most people didn't speak like that and regional presenters were introduced - funny accents an' all (just like mine). My dad left school at 14 because they were poor and he had to work so of course his grammar wasn't good. Didn't stop him being a lovely, kind, hard-working man though! As River said, I doubt that woman has too many friends either!

  7. I can be a grammar nazi but I would never judge a person on their use of language - as long as it is kind. I get really annoyed when people who are supposed to have received an education (like journalists) can't write proper and when signwriters (it is their living after all) can't place an apostrophe in the correct place.
    Maggie looks glorious.
    I find the interpretation of the all loving Christian god and his ways somewhat bewildering. Many other religions don't seem to have the hellfire and brimstone beat the congregation around the head approach.

  8. Gold electric chairs. Now THAT is mind-blowing, isn't it?

    Even though I worked in editorial professions for much of my adult life, I've never understood grammar nazis either. I couldn't tell you what a preposition is even now. I've never been any good at naming the parts of speech. I just know when it's right, and I know when it's wrong.

  9. I recognized that vintage orange tupperware immediately. I've got two of them sitting in my hoosier (you know the one that looks exactly like yours?) One holds sugar. The other holds flour.

    I cannot abide people who judge others for any fucking reason. I once had a woman comment on a tee shirt I was wearing. "Excuse me? Do you know anything about wine or do you just wear the shirt?" I just stared at her. What was the point of that question? To afford her a moment to feel superior to another person?

    I hate it. I hate women who judge other women on their appearances. I hate women who refer to themselves over and over as 'goddesses' and post dreamy moon pictures, and yet in real life, they call other women bitches or worse. What this says to me is that they do not see women as goddesses. They see themselves as goddesses, and expect to be worshipped. To hell with that.

    I hate people who will pick any reason at all to judge another human. The color of their skin, who they climb into bed with, what they wear, how they act, how much money they have, what kind of car they drive, what political party they belong to, what faith (or lack thereof) they are.

    Sorry. I went off on my own rant, but in a world of ugly, it seems to me that ending a sentence with a preposition is the stupidest, most shallow reason that someone should be judged for. (And yes, I meant to do that).

    Is it considered poor manners to rant on someone else's rant? Enjoy your holiday weekend.

  10. as far as I'm concerned that whole Jesus died for my sins so I'm saved no matter what I do so I might as well be my worst self because, hey, I'm saved is nothing more that a get out of jail free card. be bad and suffer no consequences. and the whole god made us in his image but don't engage in any human behavior because that's nasty and sinful. what the actual fuck? and as far as suffering, do you think what he went through was worse than being hanged til you're almost dead, disemboweled, and then drawn and quartered or some poor soul captured by a sadistic bastard and tortured or having your body parts blown off by an IED? humans are great at cruelty so if we are made in the image of god then their god is cruel.

    Maggie makes a great unicorn. and what a bounty of mulberries.

  11. You ARE a champion, Mary Moon! :)

  12. Lily is your daughter, right? I am confident she could build a rocket launcher if one was requested by her children. I am writing this after seeing today's post. I am sorry you are not feeling well. We are planning a small Easter egg hunt tomorrow. No religion involved. No pushing or shoving either. It amazes me how parents can act like wild animals at a kids event.

  13. When Maggie gets old enough to have a daughter asking for a costume with ten seconds' advance notice, she'll look back in wonderment at what her mom did!

    About grammar: I get very annoyed and judgy when people who are paid writers and speakers make mistakes. It's their job, ffs. But when friends in casual writing or speech say I seen her etc., let's not get all bent about it!

  14. Of course I spent almost forty years teaching English and so I had to address issues of grammar every day. The exam system has always been about getting youngsters to grasp and utilise agreed forms of grammar so guidance, correction and modelling were essential. If they didn't get that they would quite simply fail their exams.

    Adults can be extremely touchy about the way they use language because of course it is an essential part of who they are. Thinking about English, grammar, vocabulary, dialect, accuracy and inaccuracy is part of who I am.

  15. Grammar doesn't even enter into it. "Feeling poorly" is a (regional) idiom. No sense in analyzing its component parts-- it's a meaningful unit all by itself.

    Is anyone else struck by the fact that it took the transgender rights movement for everybody to know what a "pronoun" is?

  16. "My husband wouldn't know a preposition if one jumped over the fence and bit him but I've never met a better man in my life." This says it all. Also, my son started out in Catholic school and I remember being so unsettled by all the imagery of murdered Christ everywhere and looking at it through my child's eyes was the first time I really registered it all and I still haven't got over it.


Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.