They did that- Jessie and Vergil made that life with their love and they made Levon too, who is smart as his brother and as funny and determined and full of confidence as anyone could be.
So that has been beautiful today- thinking of the day Jessie and Vergil got married under the bower that her daddy and Lon made, and everyone ate cake that Lis made, and danced under the decorations that Liz Sparks and sisters put up, to the music that Hank had made a mixed tape for, and drank the beer that Vergil and his friends had made, and the groom arrived by canoe with his groomsmen and Jessie was walked down the aisle by Mr. Moon and me and it all took place on Black Mountain at the camp that Vergil's mom's husband had run for many years. It's where the famous Black Mountain College had been and who knows who had eaten in that very dining hall where there was so much dancing and merriment and rocking of babies?
The rest of the day has not been easy though. I am not convinced that all is well with my body and indeed, another lab test I'd gotten done showed something that could be something or could be nothing but bottom line is- I'm going to go see Carly again in two weeks. I also made an appointment at the Digestive Disease Clinic (could there be a worse name?) for my pre-colonoscopy exam and blah, blah, which will be on Monday. Not the colonoscopy, just the appointment. And all of this has just been TOO MUCH although physically, I have had more energy today which is good but I am still having pains, albeit vague and random.
So I'm going to try to stop talking about any of this because there is nothing to be known at this time although I fear that anxiety may well be discussed on and off.
On and off if you're lucky.
It's been a beautiful day. It was supposed to rain all day and there was even some sort of tornado warning but there's not a cloud in sight now and the new green of all the trees is absolutely stunning, especially in the light of the lowering sun to the west.
Well. It does meet my criteria- it fits in its way, is linen, and has a pocket. Just one but that will do.
I swept two porches, I cleared the way for Ralph to clean and I am going to have to call Customer Service (haha!) for him because although he did vacuum for awhile today and he is re-charged and I have taken apart and cleaned all of the parts that you can do that for, making sure he had no cat toys or tiny forks in his innards, he will light up and make his beep-beep, but he will not back out of the charger and get back to work.
So I've put all the rugs back and I've washed some of them so at least that part's done.
I pulled some weeds and also the row of stunted and bolting arugula that I thought would grow me a second crop but which has not. I picked all the leaves though, that were salad-worthy, have washed them and they are wrapped in a dishtowel in the refrigerator for our supper. I also picked peas and pulled up the last of the bolting mustard greens. It is time to plant the field peas, the black-eye peas, the white acre peas.
Everything that I've done has taken extra time because my mind is anxiety-brain-fried. Wordle has become almost impossible for me. The business of walking into a room and wondering why in the world I'm there is the norm, not the exception. I have managed a few crosswords so that's a little bit reassuring but trust me- neither one of them required a genius IQ.
But you know- this is the way it is sometimes and even if I am operating on automatic, I am functioning.
Be gentle with yourself. Anxiety is evil.ReplyDelete
The wedding photo is love personified. How gorgeous.
I am so pleased you have an outdoor cat.
Actually, I think I have two outdoor cats now.Delete
Maybe you have gallstones, Maybe you are having empathy for everyone with gallstones...You are an em-path after all! The green is so green there! Lovely sunshine! I sent Maggie's dolly , it should be there by now.ReplyDelete
I have had the gallstones thought myself.Delete
No package has shown up. I even asked the post mistress today to go look. Darn.
no way! 10 years? time it do fly. I hope they find a definitive answer for your discomfort.ReplyDelete
I can't believe it's been ten years either. Honest to god.Delete
A lovely anniversary day to the Jessie and Vergil! You need to get to the bottom of your symptoms. I hope it is soon.ReplyDelete
Me too, Joanne.Delete
being a medical person in my past career..........I'm curious, as always. But.....mostly....concerned for your wellbeing overall. Glad you are managing. Heck, you did more today than I do in 4 days! Jessie and Vergil..........I remember that day well.......and thrilled for their eternal love for each other. Be tender and easy on yourself, please!ReplyDelete
Can you believe it's been ten years? I look at Jessie sometimes and I think, "She is really not my little baby anymore." Which, duh.Delete
Of course you have to keep feeding the black cat-- for its sake and for yours. You'll earn Frequent Feral points! (Too bad you can't get free cat food that way....)ReplyDelete
I think Frequent Feral points may just add up to bring another cat into your life! Dang it!Delete
"One cat just leads to another." Believe it or not, it was really Hemingway who said that!Delete
The wedding story is just lovely! Ours was largely a homemade wedding, so I can relate. Just think, you were partying in the place where two of my art mentors lived and worked and studied and taught! We're connected. Well, we are anyway.ReplyDelete
If you still have a gall bladder, it might be grumbling. Can you get an ultrasound? That's how they found mine needed to leave.
Which two of the many well-known people were your mentors? It's such a beautiful, beautiful place. And of course we're connected.Delete
If the pain persists, I am going to ask for a scan.
I do love the wedding story! And the card. And the black cat asleep in the begonia. And the light shining through all that green. And....well...DO you have a gall bladder? Boud makes a very good point. Feel better soon.ReplyDelete
I do indeed have a gall bladder. I have all of my organs except for the appendix.Delete
Love and rest and respite from anxiety to you. I wept a little seeing those wedding photos, as though I have never met any of you in person, I remember this day from here, this little magic portal into your life & how you finding meaning and wonder and enchantment amidst regular living, that I have found so very important for so very long. xoxoReplyDelete
Oh, dear woman! That means so much to me! Thank you. With all my heart I thank you.Delete
The wedding sounds beautiful and the card August made for the anniversary is the best! Fingers crossed the something is either nothing or easily fixed. That branch looks huge.ReplyDelete
Isn't that card something else? How did our grandchildren get to be so smart?Delete
I'm glad you're going back to see Carly sooner rather than later. I know you'll worry until then though, you poor thing. And happy anniversary to the beautiful couple. Aren't they just lovely!! And fancy the groom arriving by canoe. Now THAT'S original!ReplyDelete
Of course I'll worry! I was born to worry. My mother claims I have been worrying since I was a little child. I will say that when I was a little child, there was a LOT to worry about going on around me.Delete
The groom AND the groomsmen! The kids would tell me another idea they'd have and I'd go, "What are you talking about? Why would you do that?" And yet it all turned out to be magical.
Gosh, you got a lot done today even tho you aren't feeling great. I hope you get relief soon, Mary.ReplyDelete
Staying busy! It does help.Delete
Maidenhair ferns don't like direct sun, and they DO like moisture. If that helps.ReplyDelete
Happy anniversary to Jessie and Vergil! I'm glad you have celebratory thoughts of their couplehood to distract from whatever's going on (or not going on) with your body. Breathe deeply! :)
That fern was in the laundry room! One would think there would be enough moisture in there and it sure wasn't in any direct sunlight. The damn thing is, it thrived there for a very long time, grew like crazy. And then one day, it looked like I had forgotten to water it. Which I had not. And the next thing I knew- it was all brittle and dried up. But like I said, it's coming back.Delete
I was glad to have that wedding to remember yesterday. It did help.
I try reading when I'm that anxious but I swear even while reading part of my mind still goes 'there', same for puzzling (yes, I do the jigsaws too) or walking, my mind just doesn't want to be distracted. The only thing that helps is watching TV, pretty much anything but a good mystery is best.ReplyDelete
Hang in there Mary!
Says Brigitta ..Delete
I love August's card and his spelling of "anniversary" is perfectly logical. How delightful that he shut himself in his room to make that card with all his love. I hope your anxious thoughts are just a phase you are going through right now and that soon you will get back to a sunnier version of yourself.ReplyDelete
Happy anniversary to those beauties of yours. Love that photo of them with Jessie in Virgil’s tie. I’m a little worried about you Mary Moon. Feel better my friend.