Tuesday, December 24, 2019

Rituals Have Been Observed


Strange Christmas Eve here. I had what I think was a weird and unfamiliar type of anxiety attack late this morning and decided to just take an Ativan and see what happened which is that my symptoms abated but never entirely left me. After I got the chicken salad (see above) made and the bread baked, and the ham in the oven I took a nap and then got up and took a shower and got dressed to go over to Lily's. It turned out to be a rather small gathering. Jessie and her family are not feeling well and Michael has been running a fever so it was just us and Lily's family and Jason's brother and the Darling Lenore and Jason's mother and Lily's best friend from forever and her husband and son, the one and only Wiley Cash. And Lauren, the Hartmann's roommate and our friend.

There was way too much food but it was a fairly peaceful and sweet evening. The children played and watched a Christmas movie and the adults ate and drank rum punch and I dissociated and stayed close to my husband and ate too much ham and smoked salmon and talked to my Owen.


Forget gold, frankincense and myrrh. We have ham, sourdough bread and Miracle Whip. 

The presents I ordered for all of my grandchildren have not arrived and so I'm going to look like the Big Christmas Loser tomorrow which I suppose I am. I also discovered that I gave one of May's presents to Hank and Rachel instead of one that did belong to them and no, I didn't mislabel them. I just screwed up.

That pretty much sums it all up.

Although these pictures may sum it all up even better.
When Mr. Moon and I bought this house, there was a plaster nativity scene ON THE REFRIGERATOR and it charmed the dickens out of me because I was in some sort of religious iconography phase as long the images portrayed the madonna. There are many reasons for me being in this phase. One of them was that my friend Sue who died in 1995 had loved the Madonna and had pictures of her all over her house and another was because the holy mother is so beloved in Mexico. And let's not forget the goddess aspect of Mary.
So. The plaster nativity. It looks like this.


It's pretty impressive in a large sort of way. It covers the fireplace in the dining room which is where I keep it these days. 
But the expression on the holy infant's face just kills me. 


And let's be honest- that's the holy toddler. That kid could sit straight up, throw his legs over the edge of the manger, hop down and walk out of the barn if he took a mind to and it looks to me as if he may be contemplating doing just that. 
"Oh my god," he appears to be thinking. "Really? Really? This is what life on earth is like? And who thought this was a good idea? Oh yeah. God. My father. Sure. Thanks, Dad! This is not going to turn out well."

Poor baby. And he was right. It just didn't.
No wonder his first miracle was turning water into wine. The poor kid needed a damn drink. 

I better go to bed. We have to be back over at Lily's tomorrow to eat breakfast and watch the grand unwrappings. I hope my grandkids don't hate me for waiting so long to order their presents. Oh well, they'll love me to pieces when they get lagniappe Christmas. 
Hopefully. 

Here's wishing all good things and peace and love to everyone. 
May your anxiety attacks be short, may your sleep be deep, may your home decor be as holy as mine. 

Love...Ms. Moon


27 comments:

  1. Merry Christmas Mary. I hope you have a peaceful night and a morning filled with quiet joy tomorrow.

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    1. Thank you, sweet woman. So much. I wish the same for you.

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  2. Love you thank you for making me laugh today.
    Love
    Rebecca

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    1. I almost texted you today to ask, "Should I take Ativan or call 911?"
      Haha! But I knew that you would no more know that I knew. Still, the thought of you gave me comfort.

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  3. Thank you for your beautiful blog. May you and your family have a Christmas full of Peace, Joy and Love!

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    1. Thank YOU, Bonnie. I hope that your Christmas has been a very good one.

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  4. Also my thanks! And a very happy Christmas! It's supposed to last 12 days so there's still plenty of time for the presents to be given. And you know those kids won't hate you, you're the best of all possible grandmas.

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    1. When I saw the pile of presents under the tree at Lily's I lost all worry about my presents being late. There wouldn't have been room for them. I swear.

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  5. That chicken salad always delights my soul...it is a thing to behold! I just know it is as tasty as it is beautiful.
    The holidays sure can be hard for so many of us, for so many different reasons. I'm hoping your anxiety will leave you in peace very soon.
    That photo of you and Mr Moon and Owen is precious. Thank you for another year of sharing your stories and your gorgeous family with us. You are a Madonna in my eyes. Enjoy your fruitcake!
    Love, Angie D

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    1. The chicken salad is as much Christmas now as the tree is. I don't even like eating it so much anymore but I do love decorating it.
      The holidays ARE hard. I suppose for a lot of people the joy outweighs the stress.
      I'll leave that there.
      Thank you for your sweet words. Thank you for being here.

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  6. I wish you peace, good sleep and a wonderful time tomorrow.

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    1. It has been, as August might say, "Pretty good."
      I hope your Christmas has been too.

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  7. I hope you have the Christmas you can cope with. All good wishes to you and yours. Xx

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    1. Thank you, Christina! And good wishes to you and YOURS!

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  8. Happy Christmas, Mary.
    I opened presents with my son this morning while his dad was upstairs with our daughter, who can't bear to see me, and is feeling in lots of sensory pain/didn't sleep last night.

    It doesn't matter that your presents are going to be a few days late. The mind and dad's have the pressies under control. Everything is OK xx

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    1. Everything is okay, Jo. You are right.
      And my heart breaks for your daughter. How hard her life must be and how terribly hard that makes it for you.
      If I had a magic wand...

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  9. Merry Christmas Mary. Or Merry Wednesday:)

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  10. Merry Christmas Mary,

    I’ve been waiting all year to say that, it has such a nice ring to it.
    Once again you've hit the ball out of the park with your writing. When I shared your depiction of the the baby Jesus and why he changed water into wine, my personal blogging circle all exploded in Christmas day laughter. But then my brother one upped you. Seems doctors are spending their causal time looking for medical issues in old paintings and sculptures. Goiters in particular. Nice read on NPR: https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2019/12/24/788915889/why-certain-poor-shepherds-in-nativity-scenes-have-huge-misshapen-throats
    It's a beautiful day here in Texas, worries me. I'm gonna have ham and eggnog with friends and not think about it.
    :)
    The best to you and all of your family, including those here on this blog.

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    1. I saw that about the goiters! Isn't that fascinating?
      I'm so glad I could make you and your friends laugh. Today when Jason and Mr. Moon were putting up a mount of a buck of Owen's, I thought to myself "gum" and then I laughed, thinking of you and your friends. That just tickles me.
      Ham and eggnog- perfect.
      I hope your day was lovely and filled with all the love.

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  11. a double christmas miracle, not only a virgin birth but born a two year old. poor Mary trying to birth that!
    and of course the grandkids aren't going to hate you because their presents are late.
    and at the end of the day it will all be over for another year.

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    1. Right? Poor Mary indeed!
      I know the grands aren't going to hate me. They love me. Each in their own unique and quirky way.
      Six hours and twenty minutes from now it WILL all be over. But who's counting?

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  12. Mary Moon
    Thank you for what you share about your world. I really would loooooove to know how I stumbled across your corner of the internet,but I did. Your the salve to my weird soul many days. You don't know me,and I really don't know you but your daily therapy means more then you'll ever know to me. I'm still here on earth because you never gave up and I tell my self all the flipping time if Mary Moon can do it you can too. Surprise I'm still alive, I made it through family Christmas and every other day before that, and that's a big deAl becAuse not that long ago I didn't believe I could. I had other plans and being on this earth wasn't one of them. I'm not, not depressed. My amazing aganst and worry and weight of the world didn't disappear. You some how floated into my world and became some sort of goddess that is a reward for making it through the day. I can't Thank You enough for you just being you and doing what you do. I write you a comment every night nd never publish them because I'm crazy like that. I just wAnt to tell you that's your breath in my ear has lead to My house starting to get cleaner, I'm not eating gobs of take away and pizza. I may even be eating salads who ever would of thought it. You being you saved my damn life, I 'll love you forever just for you sharing with me and the world your slide of life daily.
    So many hugs I want to give you because you've given me so so so much more then you will ever comprehend
    Hugs

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    1. And you have no idea how much this means to me. I have cried, reading it three times now. This is the best Christmas present ever. You don't know how many times I've thought that no one in this world needs to read about my so very boring, normal life and that I should just shut up already. So to read what you have written just cracked my heart open and let me feel as if maybe all of these mundane words do have meaning and isn't that what we all want? To be meaningful?
      No. I do not know you but let me tell you that I am SO proud of you for getting through a family Christmas. There can be nothing harder in some situations. I am proud of you for caring about your house and your body too. And I am absolutely incredibly proud of you for still being here.
      And now I'm crying again.
      Whatever I may have given you, please know that with this comment you gave me more than enough to balance the scales. And if I could, I would hug you so hard that I would squish you with my love.
      So thank-you. And keep living. And you know what? There are days when I think of someone I know and I think, "If she can do it, so can I." So together we all share strength and together we know we are not alone and together here we have a safe place to be.
      Please publish your comments any time you want. I understand that sort of crazy though- not publishing them. I have those types of crazy too. Not that specific one but plenty like it.
      Thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
      I don't know you but I love you for being you. Yeah, just like Mr. Rogers.
      Peace.
      Mary

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  14. I wrote a depressing as hell comment and then I read the comment above and decided to delete it, because that person is telling the whole truth about you, you are a goddess, and because you get up and do every day, and touch base with us here, we get through the day, too. Bless you, my darling. I love you more than you can even imagine. Hugs and more hugs.

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    1. And I love you more than you can imagine. Oh, wouldn't it be lovely if we could all truly and really hug? We would probably never stop.

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Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.