Sitting here trying to stone myself into some sense of reality with the internet which, of course, is a completely ridiculous idea. I'd be much better off walking in the woods and I'll do that in a little while.
My dreams this morning were so horrendous that I'm thinking a partial lobotomy may be in order. Not really.
Listen: When you are sexually abused as a child, one of the long-lasting gifts is your fear that your own children or children under you care will also be abused. That was the gist of one of my dreams. Profound damage. Things that no matter how well you learn to "deal" with things will always be there. At the age of 61 I am still angry about what was done to me and anyone who makes light of the horrific effects of childhood abuse is either in complete denial or blissfully ignorant.
Okay. Enough of that.
Luna will not stay out of the house now and has figured out how to use the cat flap that allows Maurice entrance and exit. This would not be a problem except that she pisses in the hallway every night.
On the other hand, Jack will NOT come into the house and if I bring him in, he is frantic to get out. This is a cat who will cuddle and who loves to be petted but someone must have instilled the fear of god in that cat about crossing a threshold.
And meanwhile, Maurice is the perfect cat who comes and goes and does not abuse the privilege.
I loved the President's speech last night. I did not think it was his best but he spoke the truth and he spoke it well. I love how he says, "It's the right thing to do."
It's almost Zen in its simplicity.
I am so grateful we have had him for these past years as our president. If only he had a congress who would work with him instead of stymieing every effort he made- what progress we would have seen!
I don't know. Everything sort of makes me want to cry today. And that's okay too.
I better go take that walk.
It's the right thing to do.