As Dorothy Anne has become more comfortable here, I have introduced her to Zippy, my dear and darling vintage chimp. Did any of you have a Zippy? I had one as a child and he got lost somewhere and I do believe the first thing I ever did on eBay was to search for his brother. And eventually, I found him. There were many variations of Zippy but I wanted and needed to find the exact same one I'd had and eventually, I did. I bought him and have loved him ever since. I let the children play with him gently and in my presence but they do not understand my deep emotional connection with him. He generally lives on the mantlepiece in my bedroom, always keeping watch. I let him tend to a little monkey-sock doll that Lily made me as a child that I also adore and cherish. So yesterday, when I unwrapped Dorothy Anne from her swaddling blanket in which she sleeps every night (I am not kidding you) and kissed her good morning and had a few words with her, I put her on the bed after I'd made it and brought Zippy down to sit with her.
I think they enjoy each other's company. And don't you think that Dorothy Anne is looking much more content and happy these days?
Yesterday while we were eating our picnic at the beach, August asked me why I bought a doll. I thought about it for a few seconds and said, "Well, I guess because I don't have any more babies to take care of."
"You have Mommy!" he said. "And us."
Oh, that sweet wise boy.
But as I told him, neither Mommy nor he nor Levon are babies anymore. I will never stop taking care of him and his brother and his mama but I do love babies.
I laugh at myself every night when I wrap Dorothy Anne up in her flannel blanket and kiss her good-night and I laugh at myself every morning when I unswaddle her, kiss her good morning and carefully place her on the pillows sitting up so that her eyes will be open to the daylight. Yes, I am being so silly and no, I am not obsessed with her nor do I think she is a real baby but she has triggered something in my heart, perhaps my childhood heart, that so needs something so obviously in need of tender love.
And I am most grateful that my husband does not laugh at me but goes along with my strange little quirk in this matter. Today I told him that the little sock monkey was the love child of Dorothy Anne and Zippy and he laughed with me.
Mr. Moon and I are in a very sweet place right now. A long time love takes on a life of its own, doesn't it? I've always said that sometimes the tide is in and sometimes the tide is out and I think that's true although I've never once entertained the thought of voluntarily separating from this man, even during some of the very low-tide moments. And of course we've had them. Not so many, but a few. However, from the very beginning, I knew that his love for me and his acceptance and welcoming of my love for him was something precious.
Is precious. More so all the time, I think. Something to handle tenderly and respectfully and with plenty of kisses.
And lately I've just felt more and more in love with him in all ways and I know how lucky that makes me. We are loving, we make each other laugh, we support each other whether it's me and Dorothy Anne or my blog, or him and his Camaro or his motorcycle or his hunting trips or his fishing...
We understand. Another thing I realized a long time ago and I have said it before, is that although we may not understand all of each other's interests and passions, we understand that those interests and passions are of great importance to us and that is all that matters, I think.
And maybe it all boils down to this- we both want the other to be happy.
Well, as usual, that was not what I thought I'd be writing about when I sat down here this evening. My writing process is a mystery to me but it works. For me.
Do you want to see something pretty?