Tuesday, June 4, 2019

Trigger Warning: Photo Of The Pickled Intestine Known As D. Trump

That, my friends, is the bloom of a female sago plant. We call them sago palms but they are not really palms at all. They are cycads which are plants that were already around when the dinosaurs roamed the earth with Jesus riding on their backs.

See? There's a picture. It's true. 
And here's a picture of an actual statue. 

You can go to Kentucky to the Creation Museum and see it for yourself. 

You're not going to believe anything I say now, are you? 
Well, I'm pretty sure that the picture I posted is indeed a female sago palm with her flower. The male plant puts forth a very manly cone which I have written about before. Here's a picture I took of one of mine (the sago, not the manly cone) ten years ago. TEN YEARS!


Here's another true thing.

Yep. But as you can see- we may be getting some relief near the end of the week. Rain and cooler temperatures. Even by tomorrow we might catch a break as pertains to temperature. 
I hope so. 
As Jessie said today, this heat feels so ominous. Just wrong. And I know we've gone far longer than this without rain and I know we've had temperatures higher than these at this time of year but rarely. Florida is not known for its temperate weather. I remember the year that my first husband and baby Hank and I lived in a tiny cabin sitting at the edge of a cornfield a few miles from here and the day we moved in, in December, it snowed and that summer was so damn dry and so damn hot that the corn all died. It was the saddest thing. The farmer would come by and survey his field and shake his head. We had no running water but we did have a hand pump out back and I'd get out a canning kettle and fill it up about a third of the way and let baby Hank play in it. He loved it. 
Oh my god. Did I really live that life? 

Jessie brought the boys out today to give them a change of scenery. August is still quite sick, running a high fever and just full of snot. He told me that Dr. Ness wants him to use a nasal spray which is the truth. He hates the nasal spray. But his mama can convince him to use it and praises him to the heavens when he does. Poor little guy. 
They had stopped at the Bad Girls Get Saved By Jesus (riding on a dinosaur) thrift store on the way out and Jessie scored. She got kid books and a lovely little Schwinn bike with a basket and training wheels, almost-new sneakers and a big truck puzzle book. Is there anything more fun than finding treasures for cheap, cheap, cheap? 
Well, maybe eating cherry popsicles on a very hot day. 

As you can see, Levon is quite fine and healthy but you can see the discomfort in August. He doesn't really complain except when he has to use the nasal spray but I know he feels bad. He has to. 
We read some books, August and I, with Levon saying, "See! See!" meaning that he wanted to look at the pictures too. That little guy is growing up too fast. He's also becoming quite handsome. We had a leftover buffet for lunch but August wasn't interested in eating much of it. They didn't stay too long but left when August's temperature started rising as the afternoon progressed which is how it works. 
I was so happy to see them and sent Jessie home with some wild pig sausage and the rest of that wild pig ham I'd cooked to do with as she wanted. 

And then I ironed and watched the documentary, "Going Clear: Scientology and the Prison of Belief." My fascination with cults continues.
Mr. Moon now has a nice assortment of clean and ironed shirts and I had an excuse to watch TV in the middle of the day. 

So it goes, so it goes. I think that Ellen is correct about the heat is preventing the garden plants from setting their fruit. My cucumbers and green beans are pathetic and although I do have some tomatoes ripening, not much else is going on. 

Are we loving the classy and cool ways the Brits are trolling Trump? Up to and including the queen. 
I am. Trump's such a ding-a-ling that he probably doesn't even realize it and of course he claimed that the number of protesters was very small. 
I'll tell you something else that really IS small.

Would you look at those hands?

Okay. Once again- time to make supper. 

Love...Ms. Moon


  1. He has an even smaller brain...

    I hope August feels better soon.

    1. In order of size: Hands, penis, brain.
      Hands being the largest.
      Of course, this is merely my opinion. I have no personal knowledge.

    2. I think that is about right...

  2. It's sad really watching that pompous ass make an even bigger ass of himself. He's made such nasty comments (speaking of nasty) about Ms. May and yet face to face he's a big suck up.

    Hope the heat eases up as bit and your grandson feels better soon. It's horrid having a nasty cold when it's miserable hot out.

    1. I honestly could not think of one good thing to say about the Pompous Ass if my life depended on it.
      And you're right- he's as nasty as the come.
      I think that tomorrow the heat will be less intense. I am hoping.

  3. That white waistcoat does a lousy job covering his gut, though. The long red tie and suit jacket are better disguises. I'm sure the Queen Troller set the dress code for the evening. Only vanity could put such a sour pickle look on the Cheeto's lips.

    1. You'd think that he could afford a damn waistcoat that fit his fat ass.

  4. I hate to point this out to you Professor Moon but the dinosaurs died out approximately 66 million years ago at the end of the Cretaceous period. This was of course many millennia before the semi-mythological figure known as Jesus of Nazareth appeared on the scene. I approve of Jesus being portrayed riding on a donkey, a horse or even a camel but not on a brontosaurus. Frankly, that is ridiculous.

    1. Haha! Well, if any human, mythical or otherwise, could have ridden a brontosaurus or a T. Rex, it would have been mythical holy Jesus.

  5. His sleeves are too long. For such a rich guy, I don't know why he can't employ a competent tailor. Shortening the sleeves might make his hands look less freakishly small. I still wonder why Teresa May invited them in the first place.
    Hope August is getting better, sinus infections are just the work of the devil. I wonder if Satan rode a T Rex.

    1. That suit did not fit him anywhere. And you can tell, as Joanne said, that he knew it and felt like a fool.
      August is feeling better today.
      Satan probably still rides a T. Rex.

  6. Loving our jesus on his pet dino, I am pretty sure this was well documented in films of the day, instagram also. I can not even go into the myth of the USA having a president, now, THAT is ridiculous!
    August, bless him, little guy! Well wishes for speedy recovery. LOVE

    1. Yep. Plenty of evidence about Jesus and his pet dinosaurs. He had quite a few, I hear. But seriously- I know a woman who absolutely believes that we do know what Jesus looked like. She read an article about it.
      She also loves Trump so there you go.
      August is recovering!

  7. and he knows nothing about formal wear or he would have known that he looked ridiculous with that too short jacket. yay to whoever outfitted him. so sorry August is sick. it's hard enough being sick as a grown up. well, we got 8+" of rain last night and this morning. came within a fraction of coming in the back door. went and picked all the tomatoes that were ripening before the skins could split after it stopped, standing in ankle deep water.

    1. EIGHT INCHES OF RAIN! That's crazy. And when the ground is so dry, it doesn't want to soak in at first, does it? I'm glad it didn't come into your house. I am so worried about this coming up hurricane season. Probably to an unhealthy degree.
      When I saw pictures of Trump in that jacket I thought about him climbing the steps of Air Force One with toilet paper stuck to his shoe. No one cares enough to tell him when he's looking like a fool. In fact, they probably revel in it.

  8. Poor August, you can tell he's feeling poorly from his eyes. But his beautiful Mama has his and his brother covered. Sometimes when we look back on our past selves, doesnt it almost seem like it happened to a different person entirely. Almost a different life.

    1. Yeah. He was so miserable. Bless his little heart.
      And it's true- our past selves really WERE different people in some ways. Just unbelievable to think of living that life now.

  9. Ugh. Poor August, dealing with being sick AND all that heat! I hope he gets better soon. I love that Jesus-on-a-dinosaur picture. I think I remember you using that one before. (Or did I see it somewhere else?) That's a wild story about your house with no plumbing -- I remember that crazy December when it snowed.


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