Sunday, October 16, 2011

Does it Always Boil Down To Math?

Well Jesus Pleezus, we found the source of the death smell in the guest room. The most recent one, at least. I was in there cleaning and decided that this time it was definitely coming from a closet. A closet which had a whole bunch of stuff it. All of it Mr. Moon's stuff. And hey- there are plenty of closets that are filled with MY stuff, this one just happened to have his in it.
Old computers, keyboards, printers, an actual TV, gun-cleaning stuff. Etc.
None of the electronics have worked in years. That closet was a graveyard for dead electric shit.
And, it turns out, a graveyard for a very, very dead...okay, I'll just say it- RAT!


Naw. Just a rat. So what? I suppose I should be seriously upset but mostly I'm just damn glad we found the thing and it is now far, far away from my house. The closet has been emptied, cleaned (bleach and Fabuloso were involved) and I am burning incense in there now which is not going to do a thing except mask the scent which I fear is going to linger for quite some time. The dead electronics are going to the trash depot where there is a section just for them.
It's a relief, to tell you the truth. Not just to get rid of the dead rat but also to get rid of the dead things.
We humans are such pack rats and maybe that's why I can't get too damn upset about the idea that there was a rat in my house because what are we but big ol' rats that walk on two legs and don't have fur?

I don't know. Maybe I should get more upset about shit than I do but I seem to save getting upset about shit for shit that's not even real half the time and if it is real, nothing I can do anything about for the most part which goes to show that I'm probably crazy but I'm okay with that. Mr. Moon is formulating an anti-rat plan and I trust him.

So it was a big day here at the Moon Residence.

I keep thinking about a very vivid dream I had last night wherein Rick, the star of Pawn Stars, had had to go out of town and was entrusting me to run the Pawn Shop. I'm not kidding. But it wasn't the elegant uptown pawn shop that he has on TV, it was a run-down piece of shit pawn shop but that didn't bother me and I had a pretty good time, greeting the customers who came in with their stuff to sell. I totally sounded just like Rick.
"Hello. What can I help you with? What do you have here?"
But nothing at all came in that was interesting. Mostly old typewriters and I had to tell every person that old typewriters just didn't sell and that we couldn't buy them. The only thing I bought was an old sewing basket that an old lady brought in that had beautiful antique buttons in it. I gave her ten dollars for it. I was a tough pawn shop lady.
I was nice, though. I swear. Polite. Just like Rick is.
"Thanks for coming in," I said to each customer. "Sorry we couldn't help you out."

I was relieved when Chumley and that ugly son of Rick's (Big Hoss?!) came in to take the evening shift because it was starting to get busy with a bunch of druggy-types coming in trying to sell microwaves and stuff and I did not want to deal with them.
It was a long dream with lots of characters. Rick's dad was there but he was asleep and I didn't want to wake him up. And no, this was not being filmed. This was "real" pawn shop stuff.

So maybe my dream was a foretelling of the worthlessness of junk. Who knows? Not me.

Anyway, that closet is cleaned out, the whole guest room is cleaned. I have washed and dried on the line all of the bed linens in there and I'll get it all put away and straightened up eventually. The Panther Room will be back in business with only the faintest whiff of death and that, too, will at some point disappear.

Mr. Moon just took that big old truckload of shit away and I feel lighter, somehow. I weeded today, too. It's been that kind of day- weeding out.
A good balance for a weekend where there has been so much pouring-in.

Give and take, add and subtract, x has been quantified and solved for, and we shall worry about y and z tomorrow.


  1. Oh, darlin' I envy you......not as much for getting rid of the dead rat, but for getting rid og the other dead techno stuff.


  2. I wonder is the smell of decomposition actually the smell of death, or just the aftermath? I imagine death smells ... sweeter and more disturbing - but the leavings behind, the remains rotting are just disgusting in a more basic way. These are my thoughts on this post. That and Rats by Pearl Jam, but I think that might not be your thing. Maybe. Youtube at will, it's a good song :)

  3. Lo- I feel the same.

    Jo- I am sure that death has a smell, just as birth does but you're right- this is the smell of death's aftermath. It's not a good smell either.

  4. I remember when a rat died under the floorboards in a house I lived in during college. The smell was outrageously sickening -- a combination of sweet and sour and just plain nasty.

    I'm glad that you've gotten it out.

  5. GReat you found Mr. Rat... Nothing quite as frustrating as living with that... scent. We had something in or under one of our kitchen cabinets a few years ago... also not a nice place for the dead smell. yesh!

    I think the dream is encouraging you to take your old electronics to the pawn shop rather than having the closet graveyard... I need to have that dream.

  6. you are correct ms mary moon. it does always boil down to math....


  7. Elizabeth- ME TOO!

    Ms. Fleur- Nah. I think my dream was telling me that our old electronics were of no use whatsoever and to take them to the dump, which we did.

    Mrs. A- I thought so.

    DTG- He should have stayed on the river, that fool.

  8. To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven. Be gone rat.

  9. Oh, the dead rat in the wall. Yep. Anyone who lives in an old house knows what that is like. Our city house is probably 120 years old. Built solid but lots of openings into the walls.

  10. I have a vivid memory of a rat being in the toilet in the bathroom, evidently having come through the sewer line. It was huge to my child eyes. My mother poured Lysol concentrate in the toilet and all over the rat. It died and my father took it away. But I am glad to not have any invading rats here yet. But those little flying squirrels do get in sometimes. Not pretty either.

  11. Oh so better to find the rat than to not find the rat. In my experience the smell does fade once the carcass has been removed. Yay!
    In my old house I always knew there was trouble when the cats sat staring at the wall.

  12. Maybe it's time to watch "The Pawnbroker", Sidney Lumet's film starring Rod Steiger again?

    Glad you cleansed the Panther room of the rat and the packing under which he was hiding.
    x0 N2

  13. Rubye Jack- Haha! The Season Of The Rat!

    Ellen- I would not even know how to begin to close up this house to outside critters.

    Syd- Okay. That's so much worse than a rat in the closet.

    Denise- My DOGS stare at the walls. I know exactly what you mean.

    OmGrrrl- So sayeth Jodi!

    N2- I've never seen that film. Should I?

  14. Ewwww!!!!! But, at least it was dead, and now it's far away from there.


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