Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Mea Culpa, Mea Culpa, Mea Maxima Culpa

Well, Dr. Stephen Johnson says I made my husband murder "a native Barking Treefrog, our largest and most handsome native treefrog. This species was recently designated as Florida’s State Amphibian."


Shit. Shit, shit, shit. I feel so terrible. I still stand by the fact that that frog was bigger than 2.5 inches.
But hell, he's the expert and there you go.

Well, I have learned a lesson which is to STOP FREAKING OUT!

Sure. I'm quite certain that I have now learned that lesson permanently and will never freak out needlessly again.

You betcha!

Okay. I have the dirtiest boy in the world here, crawling around under the table and getting dirtier by the second. I may be a murderer of one of Florida's State Amphibians but I try to be a good grandmother and I think it is time to clean this boy up, feed him some lunch and get him settled for nap time.

Oh God. I feel terrible. And I am sure that Dr. Johnson is shaking his head in disgust at the hysterical woman who lives in Lloyd who made her husband shoot a poor innocent frog.

I am a moron. You read it here first.


  1. Well, hey, at least this means you don't have those awful Cuban tree frogs. You can pee in peace.

  2. Mungam's BodyguardJune 28, 2011 at 1:04 PM

    if it was scary enough to make you vomit, you can kill it.
    if it was big enough to use a .22, you can eat it.
    if you can eat it, you can love it.
    and if you can love it, it can't be scary.

    Don't use this as a general approach to life and love, but as a basic mantra in managing the creatures around your homestead.

  3. Hey, I don't judge (and I'm a damn vegetarian!). I ain't cryin either. The thought of you being terrified to sit on the toilet for fear of a damn frog was too much, so it's all good. All hail to Mr. Moon, Slayer of Frogs!

    Meantime, I am re-thinking my plan to ultimately return to the tiny island when we get old. I didn't know those frogs hang out in toilets. Prolly cisterns too. OMG. Looks like we will spend our golden years in the frozen north.


  4. Well, I can't stop laughing. So what does that make me?

  5. He shot a frog. With a rifle.


    There has to be a story in here somewhere.

    So, next time you're getting worked up about something you don't need to, you know I'm going to say, put down the rifle, Mary, it's just a big frog.

  6. Mary, darling....it's OK......no need to beat yourself up. It was a lesson! You have learned it.....good for you.....you may have saved froggy from being eaten by a Florida Alligator.

    Love you.

    damn...word verification for this comment is "aphiestp"....if these words get any harder I may have to give up commenting. (NOT)

  7. oh dear.
    Dear Ms. Moon,
    Please remember to breathe. It can be difficult in the face of Monster Nature. I came home from last weekend's river trip to find a tarantula in a jar in my livingroom. My son left a note (thankgoodness) warning me aforehand. Yes, it was in MY livingroom. Now, I understand the distress, but it is important to do what you've done: offer the apology and move on. Bless your heart! Mother Nature is very forgiving.

  8. Sorry--I am good at taxonomy. But take heart because you do not have the Cuban one there...yet. I do my best not to kill anything, except a Palmetto bug (roach to most people). I do believe in karma so that probably is why I tread lightly around all things living. I have slaughtered many thousands of fish and crabs and shrimp in my career. I am making a living amends now.

  9. adrienne- EXACTLY!

    Lora- Yet. We don't have them yet.

    DTG- This is comforting.

    Mungam's Bodyguard- I should post these rules on the refrigerator.

    Invisigal- Maybe we could just GROW UP AND QUIT BEING AFRAID OF FROGS!

    Ms. Trouble- Evil. Obviously.

    Lo- Yes but the gator will go hungry. Oh my. Life is just complex.

    Laura- Oh yes. The note was a nice touch. LORD!

    Syd- Usually, I am the same although I have no compassion for Tomato Hornworms or Wasps. Mostly.

  10. And Jo- Please. I know. Best advice ever. Thank-you.

  11. oh god you crack me up.
    rebecca protector of bees

    wv: losting (no shit)

  12. Madame King- Hey! I catch bees and let them out all the time! But I guess I am bad at losting the frogs.

  13. We were just amazed that it was a frog big enough to shoot with a rifle.

    Oh well, live and learn. He would have likely been squished on the road in a few days.

  14. um, i kinda already knew you were a moron.

  15. You, of all people, are anything BUT a damn moron. Shit happens, man.

    Daddy B's comment cracked me up.

  16. Mel's Way- I have never seen one of these guys squished on the road. No. I caused the death of a poor innocent.

    daddy b- You know me so well.

    Ms. Bastard-Beloved- Shit DOES happen. Daddy B's comments always crack me up.

  17. Ditto Mel, it WAS big enough to be shot with a rifle.

    Mental note for next time - perhaps Hank's not the one to ask about frogs. The Actor always tells me the spider in the bath is as big as his head when I have to go and gently put it outside.

    I love you xx


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