I got a visit from two boys and their mama today. Jessie decided that the quarantine period was over and out they came for some Mer time. I was very glad to see them. We were so busy that I forgot to take any pictures until they were leaving.
Levon loves this book. He is obsessed with it. It's a baby board book and the whole thing is about big trucks and other large vehicles and earth-moving machines. Talk about your stereotypes.
He did play with the babies a little today. Not much. But a little.
I remember when Hank and May were very young and a woman I knew also had a young child and she was incensed that she was finding it so hard to find non-gendered clothing for her little boy. I could not figure out what she was talking about. My kids mostly wore corduroy overalls and t-shirts. In primary colors. What was gendered about that? I will say that May had a little nightgown with a robe she wore as dresses. She was too young to make the distinction between day wear and night wear and now I realize she was just ahead of her time. She loved those things and for a time wore them, one after the other, to the exclusion of all other garments. She liked dancing in them.
But she chose them. Not me.
I've always thought you should just give kids the option to play with a wide variety of toys to play with and a wide variety of books to look at and read. Same with clothing. They'll let you know what they're interested in. Maggie may love to play ball with her brothers but let's face it- her dollies are her favorite. What purpose would it serve to try and distract her from doll play to play with trucks if trucks aren't really her interest? Trust me, there are plenty of trucks around for her to play with.
To go back to that story about the mother who couldn't find non-gendered clothing for her son, why couldn't she just have given him a choice of different clothes and different colors and let him pick? August and Levon sometimes wear what we would label "girl" clothes and so what if they get mistaken for the opposite sex when we go out? They're three and one. And no one has ever made them feel as if being a girl is a lesser thing than being a boy or being mistaken for a girl is shameful. It's just different. Pink and blue have no meaning at all to them except they're different colors.
Of course in my family, gender is something we've all learned is in some ways a lot more complex than we think and in other ways, a lot less important than we've been led to believe.
And I am so grateful for this.
I'm not sure why I felt the need to step up on my soapbox right there. Was I defending Levon's choice to be obsessed with a "boy" book?
That would be funny.
Long story short- the kid loves trucks.
When I heard that August and Levon were coming this morning I waited to go to the dump and the post office until he got here.
Yeah. I know. I'm a great grandmother.
Not a great-grandmother. Or is it greatgrandmother? I don't know.
He loves that, though. Sitting in that big boy booster seat with just a seatbelt as we drive the entire block and a half to the dump.
When we pulled out of the yard I said, "I have to be very careful."
"Why?" he asked. Of course.
"Because you're in the car and you're precious. Did you know that you are precious?"
When we got to the post office and I helped him get out of the car he asked, "Why I have to stay in the car at the dump but I can get out at the post office?"
"I guess I thought that the dump isn't very fun but the post office is."
He thought about that and didn't say anything so I guess my answer was sufficient.
We talked about how the post office used to be a train station.
"Do you know what that is?" I asked him.
"Where the trains stop," he said.
We talked about that. How the trains used to carry people and they would stop and get off or else buy tickets and get on at the train station. But that now it's a post office because the trains don't stop here anymore.
Then he asked me if this was still Lloyd. I suppose he's trying to figure out what that means. This led to a discussion about how he lives in a city but I live in a village which is much smaller than a city.
"I like living in a little village," I told him.
"I like living in the city," he said.
"You don't want to live in a village?" I asked.
"No. I would miss my mudder and my fadder."
He really says that.
Calling Alan Sherman.
Three points if you get that reference.
My opinion on that is- Fuck you, Bernie! Don't you think you did enough harm in 2016? For Christ's sake. I will NEVER forgive him for taking votes away from Hillary. Never. In trying to win in an impossible situation he fucked our country so hard it may never recover.
Well, the Russians had something to do with that too.
And who knows who else?
Fuck him. And his ego.
Go ahead. Tell me how great he is. I don't care. My point is valid and you know it.
If I vote for another old white man in 2020 his name is going to be Joe.
My god I miss Obama so bad it hurts my heart.
All right. I don't have time to write about politics. Or the Catholic Church. Not unlike with Trump it would appear that the layers to the reeking rotten onion which is that institution never end.
I swear. If I were an all-powerful god, I'd probably just do another great flood. This planet sure could use another cleansing of humanity.
We're going to do it for ourselves.
Maybe not a flood this time but you know what I mean.
Tragically, this is not a joke, simply a horrifying and terrifying truth. It's gone way past inconvenient and is now ghastly.
I'm going to go make some egg rolls now. Kathleen used to say that she was an ostrich who carried around her own bucket of sand to stick her head in.
Aren't we all?
Still, we must eat in order to strengthen ourselves, our hopes, our resolve.
I'm definitely old enough to get that 3 point bonus! What memories that brings back! We couldn't afford camp, but my cousin and I memorized every word and played pretend camp.ReplyDelete
My reaction to Bernie running again was much the same. Much love.
Pretend camp would have been fine with me. I never did like it.Delete
There sure do seem to be a lot of people who are simply thrilled that Bernie's running. Jesus.
And three more points here.ReplyDelete
Bernie, go away.
Catholic church, go away. I suppose that is another one we all know about, but didn't know all about. My god, there is a department to handle the kids.
Augusts' eyes are still heavy. He has a bit to go with his virus or whatever.
Another Alan Sherman fan! I loved that song.Delete
The Catholic church has gotten away with too much for too long. I get absolutely enraged when I think of all of the innocent people who have suffered because of that horrible institution over the centuries.
And you're right about August. He's still got a bit of the cold for sure.
Joe is the ONE and only old white man I would EVER and ALWAYS vote for. Nuff said on that. The current state of affairs makes me ill almost every day.......ILL, I say.ReplyDelete
Your grands and your family are just so comforting and cozy and loved......I smile every day to see your tales, your blessed life you have created......... cancels out all the ills, for the time being....keep it coming!
Love and hugs to all of you
Yep. Ill is right. Sick. Depressed. Anxious. Horrified.Delete
Need I go on?
I don't think so.
And don't worry. I'll keep blogging. I feel certain of that.
Looking from the outside, I see Bernie Sanders as a great man - a warrior for truth and justice in challenging times. However, he is too old to be America's next president. Instead of choosing that route he should be putting his weight behind another candidate - younger and more realistic. Perhaps someone like Amy Klobuchar. I believe she has what it takes to be America's first female president and someone who has the ability to address the devastation caused by Hurricane Donald in order to - Make America Kind Again!ReplyDelete
I agree with you, Mr. P. If Bernie really cared, he'd do his best to get a younger candidate elected. Honest to god, we've had enough old white men in office. It truly is time for a change.Delete
I got the reference! as for Bernie...WTF, I mean really. I'd have more respect for him if he ran as an Independent which he is and has always been instead of repeatedly glomming onto the Democratic party for their resources and presence. and he's just too old. and the Catholic Church can go away too. molesting children and raping nuns. what happens to the babies. you know there had to be babies.ReplyDelete
Oh- there were babies. And the church even had official ways to deal with them. The fuckery never ends does it?Delete
I remember that song.ReplyDelete
Bernie seems like a good man but he's too old. Who the hell would want that job at his age?
In some ways I think our children come into our lives fully formed at some level. We can help or harm their development but they are essentially themselves from day one. At least that's been my experience.
I have been laid low by a tiny virus and feel like shit today. My sinuses are producing copious amounts of mucous and my throat has been relined with razor blades. Death is obviously imminent:)
Thank you for making me smile.
Well, Bernie sure seems to want it badly.Delete
I totally agree with you. Kids come into this world with their own agendas and personalities. And sure, we can mess with that or we can embrace it but we can't really change them at all. Which in some ways is a relief.
I don't like that razor blade reference. That's what strep always feels like to me. Be wary!
I remember that song! It was funny. It's unfortunate that Bernie can not just sit down and be quiet. His time has passed. If we get four more years of the cheeto, I don't think we'll survive. Of course, since all of the insects are dying, we probably won't anyway.ReplyDelete
I wish I didn't believe as you do but in fact, I do and it's horrifying.Delete
Sometimes I wish I believed in a god.
I've always liked Bernie, but he's too old and has too much baggage from the last campaign. I wish he would withdraw and support someone else. That being said, I'd vote for one of my dogs if they got the Democratic nomination. Anybody but Trump in 2020!ReplyDelete
President Ginger has a nice ring to it. Marco could be the Secretary of State with George running the C.I.A..Delete
Mr. P. is right. And so are you. These are the times for the real yellow-dog democrats to stand up and fight for our candidates. Bernie does have too much baggage.Delete
I loved your soapbox spiel. I’m here for every word.ReplyDelete
We all have our own little bully pulpits here in blogland, don't we?Delete
I'm not a huge fan of Bernie, but I think when it comes to Hillary's presidential demise there are a lot more nefarious forces to point the finger at than him. I hate to say it, but I just think he's too old. I think Joe Biden is too old, too.ReplyDelete
It's so interesting how, as much as we try these days to be open to gender differences, some kids just reinforce the stereotypes! I guess that isn't a problem, as long as they're not MADE to reinforce the stereotypes. Right?!
Biden's too old too. You're right. Still, I love him. And if Bernie gets the nomination, I'll vote for him of course. But good Lord!ReplyDelete
Stereotypes don't come out of nowhere. Some of them are far more culturally based than others, I'm sure but as Erica Jong once said, When the baby cries, it's the woman's breasts that leak milk. Or something like that.