Thursday, May 14, 2009

Wah-Wah, Part II, Oil On The Water


My loves- What I said in the last post was not about being critical of each other and our choices. Let's get that straight. We all make choices that we think are best for our children and which we are, out of necessity, forced to make, from the moment we know we have conceived until they lay us in our grave. That is what being a mother is.

NO! What this post was about is the fact that our system here in the United States of America which we use to deliver 99% of our children, is broken, while proven and far more cost-effective methods of doing the business of birth are available. AND that the very system which is broken has ensured that we are not aware of that, are for the most part not given the opportunity to learn about it easily, and that if people REALLY KNEW THE TRUTH, they would be up in arms.
I don't know if the AMA is the richest and most powerful lobbying group but I knew their bank account and efforts are not too shabby. Throw in the fact that they are hand-in-glove with the insurance industry (which probably IS the richest and most powerful lobbying influence in the country) and you have a Goliath which is going to take a lot of brave women to overcome.

That's what I'm saying. I'm also saying that everyone who has not seen this movie, should.

The whole topic is so sensitive because we all feel that perhaps we could have done better or perhaps we feel we were cheated or perhaps we feel judged and that is part of my point. There is research which proves that the best way to deliver babies safely and with better outcomes physically and emotionally for both the mother and child is NOT the way we do it. And that women do not know this. We have been lied to. We have been told that "the doctors will take care of everything."
And in their defense, I will say that they are not taught how to deliever babies naturally. They are taught to look for pathologies. They are taught to rely on technology. They are taught that natural birth is fraught with danger.

My favorite OB in the world, a tiny humble man here in Tallahassee told his son, when he was in school to become an OB himself, to "follow the midwives around." He told him that because he said, "They're the ones who know how to deliver babies."
Amen.
Very few doctors are this wise. But there are a few. And there are a few brave enough and educated enough to provide back-up for midwives. This doctor in Tallahassee has been one of those for years.
When I was going through a residence program for prenatal care years and years ago, I told "my" doctor that I was planning on a midwife assisted birth and he freaked. Absolutely freaked. He brought in this doctor, who was at the time the head of that residency program and had me repeat my desire to deliver at home.
"Okay," said Dr. Brickler. "If you run into any problems, come on into the hospital and we'll take care of you." He smiled and left the room.
My doctor stood there, open-mouthed.

But he learned something that day. I hope he remembered it. I will never forget.
Dr. Brickler was giving me options.

Which is what we should have, just like Miss Bliss said in her comment on that last post. She lives in Canada.

Not everyone wants a hospital delivery. Not everyone wants a home birth. Not everyone SHOULD birth at home. Not everyone SHOULD birth in the hospital either. There are many, many factors involved in the decision and they should all be considered wisely and calmly.

Which is how I would like this discussion to go. Wisely and calmly.

Like Dr. Brickler, bless his soul, his heart, his hands.

Now. Let's all step back and agree that all of us are doing and have done what we considered to be the very best thing for our children and that we should all have facts, not lies and made-up fear-based bullshit to base our decisions on. And THEN, we should be able to get the sort of help we need to have the sort of birth we want. We should not be angry at each other. We should be angry at the system which has failed us and which continues to fail us and which robs us of our rights, our power and the information we need and replaces them all with gleaming technology and thinly veiled threats.

And watch the movie. The Business Of Being Born. Just watch it. Whether you've had all your children or whether you've never had a child and don't even plan on having one. Because this is a discussion which needs to be had because the way we birth our children, the way we treat our mothers and our babies affects all of us in the end.

And the image above is from the movie.

15 comments:

  1. Ha, I am just gracefully-for once-bowing out of the discussion. : ) Too much of it, no matter how much you try to prevent it, IS intensely personal, and there are those who judge. For me, the best thing is just to avoid the whole thing.

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  2. Kori, I understand. But I also am not, obviously, getting my point across. This was supposed to be a discussion about the options we have and do not have in childbirth. Or are not aware we have. Of the FACTS we do not have.
    And also, about the fact that the United States of America does not support new mothers or babies, no matter what we say. Other countries are far more advanced than we are in recognizing the need for mothers and babies to be given support in many different ways that we just can't seem to find the money for.
    Bless you darling. You're a great mother and fierce. I know I've said that before, but I mean it.

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  3. So it seems to me that we need to educate the educators. That is, find a way to infuse this discussion into med schools, so the doctors are more familiar with options and don't scare their patients. Put midwife info into GP's offices. If it really is more cost effective (and yes healthier too) then that will be all the motivation the insurance companies need. As long as they have a system to weed out higher risk mothers, otherwise the liability will be too high for the insurance companies to take on.

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  4. Steph- If only it were so simple. First of all, doctors do not want to give up the gig of delivering babies. Incredibly lucrative under our system and the more technology and surgery you can add on to it, the better. So they have no desire to teach better birthing practices in hospitals. That's the cynical me talking but I think I'm right.
    For awhile, at least around here, OB's were hiring midwives like crazy to work with them and to do pre- and post-natal care and the "simple" deliveries. They could hire a bunch of midwives, insurance included, for what they could hire one new MD.
    Then the midwive's insurance went up. I have a feeling because so many of them were associated with doctor practices and when the practices got sued, everyone got caught in the scatter shot.
    It's a many-layered problem.
    Hey! They all are!

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  5. If a person chose to work with a midwife without going through their insurance, about how much does that cost outright?

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  6. No idea for your area. If you go to www.thebusinenessofbeingborn.com, they do have some links to midwife services. But I would look up "midwife services" in your phone book and go from there.
    It's far less than a doctor, I'll tell you that.
    I recommend the website just for interesting reading.

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  7. The insurance industry is a real doozy to contend with. I think perhaps that may be at the bottom of a whole lot of the misinformation.

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  8. I guess since DTG hasn't birthed any babies, he won't show us the way on this one...

    I wonder if Netflix has the film?

    ::wanders off::

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  9. Ms. Trouble- Netflix definitely has it. And I believe that DTG is a big proponent of having your baby where you feel comfortable.

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  10. PS I am so sorry that the whole issue of insurance coverage dictating a woman's birth and health options is a reality for all of you in the US...I hope that change comes soon

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  11. Ms. Bliss- I am afraid that it will not happen anytime soon. We are slow here with change.

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  12. That image you posted says it all, I think.

    I haven't given birth yet, nor have I ever been pregnant, so I can't weigh in on this issue with any experience, like many of you can.

    I just appreciate this information, and you for sharing it.

    I have long been interested in midwives and what they do, and decided a while back when the time came I would like to go that route, assuming their isn't a medical reason that would force me into the hospital.

    I am going to rent this movie asap. I have heard many wonder things about it from other, also.

    Are you familiar with the True Blue Doolas of Jefferson County? I know the lady that runs the program. It sounds like something you would be PERFECT for.

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  13. Lady Lemon- I think I may have met the lady who heads that program. I should check that out.

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  14. Doesn't this seem to be a problem with a lot of "women's issues" in America?

    You are a wise woman, Ms. Moon. Very wise, indeed.

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Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.