Saturday, May 9, 2009

Saturday in Lloyd

Well, the chickens are fine and that's good. See how cute they are on their perch? I wonder if the way they're facing is an indication of their sex, which would mean we have three two roosters too many. This would be about the way our luck is running, I have to say.

Some miscreants have been stealing things from the garage and it's driving Mr. Moon insane and I don't blame him for feeling that way. They're taking his processions and invading and entering his personal space and the word from the deputies is that the perp is known and a crackhead and blah, blah, blah.
Obviously the crackhead has help because they've taken some large items.
So he's completely disturbed and I don't know what to do and if I so much as ask him what he'd like for dinner he looks at me like I've asked him where he wants to be buried. And I feel completely helpless.
Meanwhile, I've decided I HAVE to ask my mother out for tomorrow's Mother's Day gathering, no two ways around it. She called me this morning to tell me that she'd had the worst headache of her life last night and almost called 911 but didn't and finally fell asleep, not caring if she lived or died. But she feels fine today.
Okay.
So I'm sort of feeling layers and layers of guilt. I made Mr. Moon move here despite the fact that he didn't want to and just when things were really settling in and become fun, here comes the crime. And of course the mother thing.
Well.
Besides that, all went well with our third performance of the play last night. Three down, three to go. We're sold out tonight and if the crowd is anything like last night's, it'll be a hoot. They were drunk and happy and vocal and were as interactive as you could possibly wish. I found myself doing something just a bit short of stand-up improv and boy was that fun! The boob jokes are getting more and more over the top (haha!) and the entire cast has become nothing more than a group of laugh-whores. We've completely lost any shred of dignity we may have ever possessed and that is when the fun begins. There is no visual joke too base for us, my friends!
And I have learned that if you keep a straight face and speak in a fake-Russian accent, talking about boobs with very obvious hand-gestures is sure to bring down the house.
So that's life in Lloyd today.
A thief on the loose, a depressed and angry Mr. Moon (he's talking shotgun here) and me, trying to figure out how to make one damn thing better.
But the chickens? Ah. They're great.
I hope all is well in your world. And let me say one more thing- every word that I have gotten in the comment section to my last two posts made me cry. Every one. I can't believe the depth of feeling and the intelligence and wisdom of people who come by here and read what I've written and take the time to comment.
I may crack jokes and I may dip into pathos and I may be too dramatic and I may not say what I mean to say always, but you guys? You get it. You get it and you give me back so much that I am stunned.
Thank-you. There is nothing more to say about that, except I love you.
And I do.
Ms. Moon

19 comments:

  1. There is nothing worse than someone milling around who shouldn't be. And especially if they're toting things off. Poor Mr. Moon. It seems to me that this sort of thing happens to the best natured folks and maybe the most ill prepared to cope with the mischief? When he's offset, I just leave my guy be. When he really needs my care, he comes after it.

    Could you talk him into a BB gun?

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  2. Love you , too. Mary. Thanks for being the You you are.

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  3. Ms. Trouble- No. Mr. Moon knows his weapons. BB guns are for squirrels. Shotguns are for people.

    Sally- And thanks for being the YOU you are.

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  4. Oh my....

    Well, I suppose you two should gird up your loins and prepare for some long nights. Crackhead robbers, beware The Moons!

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  5. Crackheads in Lloyd? Say it isn't so.
    Your post just reminded me - now that I've taken everything of value out of my shed, I need to take the padlock off of it, as it's rusting. Then, I hope some crackheads go in there & set fire to it, so I can collect the in-surance and replace it with one that doesn't feature pealing paint...

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  6. How does the law feel about people who wait up for the crack heads and fire a shotgun burst over their heads to scare the bejasus out of them?

    Or does that make them pull out their gun and fire back in the bedroom window? Hmm - maybe nbot a good idea.

    My friend got broken into twice when she was living round the corner from a crack den. Infuriatingly, they didn't take the giant tv because it was too giant, but they put a duvet on the floor and threw everything into it - including the remote. Gah.

    spam word: phactive. You need to get phactive on their asses, whatever that could mean.

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  7. Ms. Trouble- Seriously. Although really, Mr. Moon would not take the law into his own hands in such a way. We all understand that, right?

    MOB- GREAT idea!

    Ms. Jo- Yes. These people took things like a pressure washer but left the nozzles. Smart. Very smart.

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  8. Yes, I understand he is a good man who is only frustrated.

    Law abiding, that's Mr. Moon!

    Absolutely.

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  9. I'm with All This Trouble...maybe Mr. Moon and a friend or two should sit out in the garage with the lights off and wait for the perps...just to scare them, of course, or to keep them there until the cops come.

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  10. Ms. Trouble- Of course! All the laws that count, anyway...

    Ginger- That idea has been discussed. Believe me.

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  11. Browsing through your posts it's amazing to me how rich this blog is.
    You offer so much here, in such graceful language. And your chickens are cute, too :)

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  12. Yea, I spoke with Mr. Moon about a week ago or so when it was only the fishing poles... and it is very disturbing and distressing. I really do understand the whole waiting around with a shot gun thing. I don't condone it, I understand it. Just to shoot in the air and make the f---s piss themselves would be pure satisfaction..

    I know it is hard for you, mother's day with mom and all. But I am glad you are going to have her out. You would beat yourself up too much any other way. Maybe we'll pop over and distract things for a bit. Harley can serenade the troops with a piano concert. hee hee.

    Feel better dahlink and keep those boobies up! :-p

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  13. Mr. Moon must be infuriated, my hubs would be the same.

    I wish I wasn't so far away, I could use a laugh and your play sounds like a good one.

    I couldn't figure out WHAT to get my mom, the woman has everything she needs and has way more money than me... I got her a avocado tree to plant. Hopefully she'll share the fruit with me :)

    Enjoy your time with your kids tomorrow.

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  14. Maggie- But that's how I feel about your blog- it is so rich! Layers of richness like a beautiful dress of taffeta and silk and sheerest chiffon and underneath it all, dense, dark velvet.

    Ms. Fleur- Keeping THESE boobies up is quite a trick, I tell you! But yes, come join us for sushi tomorrow afternoon.

    Steph- An avocado tree would make me incredibly happy. I hope it makes your mama happy, too.

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  15. Happy Mother's Day to you today Ms Moon =) I hope it goes ok today with your mom there.

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  16. Being stolen from is rotten. A horrible feeling.

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  17. SJ- Thank-you. It did!

    XBox- I think this is more of a man-thing and you would understand.

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  18. And we love you!

    Poor Mr. Moon, that really is a shitty situation. I'd be pissed off too!

    I heard a show on NPR the other day and I thougt of you and your chickies. The show was about how people in big cities are wanting to have their own chickens more and more, but it is against the codes. They are trying to get the codes changed, but mean while they are breaking the law, illegal-chicken style.

    Didn't know how trendy you are, did you?

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