I Left Lloyd

That is the only picture I took today. One lousy (and it is lousy) picture of a blooming redbud against a gray sky. I took the picture right outside where we take pottery which is a park with ball fields and a playground, tennis courts, and nature trails. It is really quite lovely and when I lived in that neighborhood, I spent a lot of time there with my children. 
The redbuds are usually the first to show color which indicates that spring will come. I am discounting camellias because they are absolutely a fall, winter bloomer so not quite the same. I'm also seeing Japanese magnolias beginning to announce their fancy selves and that is always a joy. I went searching for a photo online of them but decided to just wait and give you pictures of the one I have in the backyard which takes a bit longer to bloom because of all the trees around it as well as the fact that it's one of the darker varieties and I think they bloom later than the ballerina slipper pink ones do. 

It was not that difficult to get up in the almost darkness this morning. When my phone began its soft chiming, Maurice got up from where she was sleeping beside me and came up to stick her face into my face to see if I was aware of the fact that it was time to get up. I turned off my phone, assured her I was, laid there for a few minutes, and then got out of bed. 
Maurice of course just settled back down and went to sleep. 
By the time I was dressed, all was well with the world and I drove to Jessie's house and drove us to class after giving Sophie some love. It was cold this morning. 
For us. FOR US! 
37° when I left Lloyd. 

When I left my flower bowl last week I wrapped it well in hopes that it would not dry out so much that I couldn't finish what I was trying to do with it and it wasn't terribly dry. I rolled out the little worm-strips to attach to the edges of the petals and using a damp sponge and my finger dipped in water, I tried to get at least all of the outside petals edged but it was a very time-consuming process. I didn't begin to have time to smooth and ensure the stability of the backs of the petals, nor to even begin to work on the inner petals. 
Sigh.
I did manage to lift the bowl out of the slump bowl I had it in and transfer it to a different one that I could better work with and at least nothing came off or fell apart or collapsed. 
I did my best to smooth that edging to both backs and fronts but it was not an entirely successful attempt. 
What was there to do as the time for the class's ending came and then went but spray the bowl down with water and cover it carefully in plastic?  

I do realize that I am still very much in a learning phase of this type of pottery and I can only imagine I will be in that learning phase for as long as I dabble. However, gaining experience through one failure after another can become frustrating and I got frustrated today. 
Oh well. La-di-dah. Life goes on, does it not?

I did mean to take a picture of the vastly flawed bowl at the end of class and even went and fetched my phone with which to do that when something distracted me (I have no idea what) and that plan went to the wayside. 

Lily couldn't make it to lunch today so Jessie and I went to a Mexican place we like and I got what I always get which is a chili relleno because they make them so beautifully. Right after we sat down, a woman came over to the table and told Jessie that she'd been her nurse when she had her baby and that she was the BEST and she thanked Jessie. I know that made my girl feel good. 

After lunch, I went to Publix because it's been a week and how I've managed to survive this long is a mystery to me. 

It was all fine, being in town, being around people, but there were a few minutes in pottery where I could feel my brain's electrical connections beginning to buzz and blur and I will tell you the truth- I took half of one of my emergency Ativans because I do not like getting to that point. There was absolutely nothing going on in that studio which should have made me anxious. There was nothing loud, Gail's playlist was a good one, everyone was being so supportive of everyone else, and my hands were busy with the clay, rolling, pinching, smoothing. I was not worried about propane or running out of onions or any upcoming doctor appointments or my husband running off with that black-haired truck driving woman or not being able to find a baby I was supposed to be taking care of or passing an exam or saying something stupid in a social situation (i.e. "Fuck that shit") or making Thanksgiving dinner or driving a very old car in the dark down long, snaky, dirt roads with children in the back, or...anything. Really. Not anything like any of that. 
Of course there was the never-ceasing fear that all of us are living in at every moment of our lives these days. 
But mostly, I think it was all just being in a room with other human beings, albeit human beings I have come to know and care for dearly, who seem to accept me as I am. 

I suppose this is why it's called crazy. 

Vergil and the boys are up at the cabin right now, eating pizza and salad. Vergil is trying once again to figure out why the internet phone connection gets dropped every time only a few minutes into the conversation. 

So they called me while they were eating their supper and we chatted for quite awhile. The call was not dropped. 
Here's what the bar between the kitchen and living room looked like when it was all set and ready for pizza. 

Now just look how pretty that Fiesta Ware is and how well it goes with the thrift store napkins I bought.  

I better go cook the little piece of salmon I bought today. I still have salad, and spinach and rice casserole and that will make a perfect supper. Perhaps not as good as pizza but good enough. 

You see- I have nothing whatsoever to be anxious about. 
Not one thing in this world. 

Love...Ms. Moon