All the while, incorporating those things which I do love about these dream houses. The hallway lined with windows and plants, the little pool and fountain outside the door, the ocean somewhere nearby.
And still this morning I woke from horrible dreams. A hurricane had passed. I had nothing to wear. My stepfather dogged my every step, begging me to let him take me in his arms. I yelled at him, I ranted, I cursed him. He would not leave.
People were partying in yet another dream house addition, a guest house, and I chased them out.
I tried to explain depression to someone who insisted that all I had to do was to focus on all of the good things in my life, this world.
The dreams dragged me down into a pewter depth of feelings that were, to say the least, not comfortable.
What to do?
Let the chickens out, drink the smoothie. Go for a walk.
This blooming, finally, on my front gate.
The sky as gray as my soul, the air as humid and murky as my thoughts.
How could someone lose this?
I saw a rabbit, hop-running across the road in front of me. I saw a huge gopher turtle slip into his or her burrow.
I was sad not to get his picture but then I looked up to see another, that one's twin (at least to my human eye) lumbering along, also heading towards the burrow.
He allowed me to come close and although he started to pull his head and legs into his shell, when I spoke softly to him, he stopped and looked up at me, as if waiting to hear what else I might say.
I thanked him (her?) and we both went on our separate paths.
I am home now and feeling better, dreams drifting on to probably waylay me again.
The Firespike has begun to bloom and I swear, it is happening before my eyes.
This is a plant very easy to root and I have done just that and planted it all over the yard.
This is where I am going to spend my day. I need a day of retreat and dirt and caring for what I have right here.
I have plenty of company, none of which will ever torment me in my dreams.