Thursday, November 6, 2008

Thanks Procter And Gamble!


I sort of feel like comedians after 9/11. When is it permissible to discuss anything not related to the recent earth-shaking event?

Well, for me that would be one day.

I was walking and listening to NPR on the antique Walkman this morning when I heard about a study that was recently done in Australia and which is being written up in the New England Journal of Medicine on 814 post-menopausal women which involved the use of a testosterone patch to see if it increased the women's libidos.

Guess what?
It did.

Women who received the testosterone patch reported having twice as many satisfying sexual encounters a month than before they were on it, while women on the placebo patch reported having 0.7 more satisfying sexual experiences than before.

AND...when I say "twice as many" what that means in this particular study was that they had TWO more satisfying sexual encounters a month. And the placebo patch women were having almost (don't you love statistics?) ONE more sexual satisfying sexual encounter a month.

Oh boy. Makes me want to run out and get me some patches.

And oh yeah, there was some unwanted hair growth and four of the women on the real patch developed breast cancer while none of the placebo group did, but hey! TWO MORE SATISFYING SEXUAL ENCOUNTERS A MONTH! TOTALLY WORTH IT!

Why don't they do a study which tries to determine if a dinner out and a foot rub doesn't get similar or better results?

No unwanted hair growth, no increased breast cancer, and I have a strong feeling the results would be at least as good as putting male hormones in female bodies.

Good grief!

15 comments:

  1. Do you want to know why I am addicted to your blog... Because it is never the same from one day to the next. You amaze me. Yours is the ONLY blog I check every day, and more than once. (even if I dont always have anything to say). :)
    -michelle

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  2. So I guess coming out of the shower and saying "Ya wanna?" before you dry off, is a bad plan?

    Funny post.

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  3. Blimy a foot rub and dinner out. I didn't realise you were so high maintenance Ms Moon

    We have what we call Leeds Foreplay here:

    "Brace yourself lass, I'm having a go..."

    ;)

    Fat Lad

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  4. I am laughing out loud!

    And, that was the perfect picture you put up to go with this!

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  5. That was pretty funny, although I must say that I had no idea, until now, why you always want Dad to take you out and give you foot massages. Hah, just playing.

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  6. Hello Just Me! Thanks for saying what you said and thanks for reading and thanks for commenting.
    Really, really, really.

    Brother B- whatever works for you, dearie.

    Fat Lad- High maintenance woman- that's me. I'm afraid the Leeds Foreplay would have me laughing so hard I wouldn't be able to concentrate.

    Yeah, Nicol. I love the fan. We menopausal women need fans for our hot flashes.

    HoneyLuna- yeah. Like I ever get a foot rub.

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  7. Since I would puke if anyone even touched my feet much less tried to rub them, I have to modify the study...I would bet that a man who cleans up after himself would lead to more satisfying sexual encounters for BOTH sexes...

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  8. Rachel- you could be in the back rub category. We'd allow that substitution.

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  9. dinner out and a footrub! hahahaha.. you're so awesome ms moon

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  10. Hey AJ! But seriously, don't you think? Nice dinner out, little cozy time on the couch, etc, etc?

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  11. Ms. Moon. Driving home from work today it dawned on me that you thought the blogs I wrote about were metaphors and that you were one of them.

    Good God No.

    I was writing about these 2 sites:

    http://chickenliver.wordpress.com/

    http://www.thepurpletrumpet.blogspot.com/

    They're a couple of hate sites built on tearing others down, me included. I didn't have you in mind at all.

    I only brought the post up again because the PT just ripped me a new one because of it. So I was just defending myself and mocking them (not you, Ms. Moon).

    I would never accuse you of lacking imagination and all that other stuff you said. I like you, Ms. Moon.

    (but you're not the author of one of those sites are you?)

    KIDDING!

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  12. Oh dearie no, BHJ. I have never heard of those sites before.
    Funny thing is, I like your site too. Mostly.
    You shine like a beacon when you write about how much you love your family- especially your wife.
    The post about the birthday party freaked me out, especially because of the responses you got. Violence is an anathema to me, even when it is truly metaphorical. That's just me.
    It freaks me out.
    But, as I said, we all have our own opinions and yours are generally quite interesting and well written.
    Thanks for stopping by.

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  13. Hmmm...what's better? A feminine woman who feigns a headache or a sexually voracious woman with a beard?

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  14. Wow, unwanted hair growth AND breast cancer? No thanks!
    I have heard that Welbutrin serves the same function of putting women in the mood more often and making it easier for them to be "satisfied". I can attest that this is true too, I took it for about a month until I found out I was allergic. :( What a sad day that was!

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  15. Mike- sometimes I think men would choose the sexually voracious woman, even with the beard.
    But. not all, I'm sure.
    I'm thinking that if I had a lot of "unwanted hair growth" I might not feel so sexy. You know?

    Lady Lemon- the perfect drug? And wouldn't that be the way- you're allergic. I'm so sorry.

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