Thursday, September 10, 2020

Just Strange, Strange Times


 

Well, dear Steve Reed told me how to make my pictures the size I want them and I am grateful to him for his advice. That extremely tropical-looking thing there is my banana bloom and I think those little green things are the actual bananas. Here's a shot from right underneath. 


I am so intrigued by this flowering and the fruit. 

When I got up this morning Mr. Moon had already gone to town. He had a scheduled physical at 8:45 and then he had things to do in town. A long, long list of things which he didn't finish up until just a little while ago. But all of his bloodwork came back good and he is a healthy boy and I am happy. 

About that, at least. 

I am struggling somewhat these days. It's probably Covid-related but it actually feels more like just a continuation of how I've felt for most of my life which is slightly depressed and when I feel that I've felt this way for most of my life I have to realize that yes, it is most likely depression although I would have to say that it's a mild sort. Not a snapping, foaming-at-the-mouth, pawing-to-get-in-the-door black dog sort of depression. More of a sleeping beast on the porch who raises his head and growls occasionally, showing me his fangs just to keep me in line. I didn't walk this morning. I have no excuse. I just didn't want to. When I feel this way every thing seems to take all of my energy, even the smallest things. And I only did the smallest things although I picked more field peas and while I was picking rain started coming down, first just in slow, big fat drops, and after I was done and inside, it came down more seriously. I've spent most of the day sitting on the couch and shelling those peas and watching the last season of "The Office" and I am grieving for when it's over entirely and I don't know what I'll have to look forward to in terms of a simple pleasure that sometimes makes me laugh. 

Lily sent me these pictures though, which cheered me. 



Her text read, "Maggie making faces to showcase her glitter fabulousness."
The child is so beautiful. Even without her ringlets. Every time I see her short hair I have a moment of silence for those curls but then I think of the story Gibson told about how, after she'd cut her hair and all was still in chaos, he happened upon the shorn glory in the bathroom and shouted, "I FOUND THE HAIR!" and I laugh a little. 
I also think about Maggie when she was just a wee tot, still crawling and we were at Melissa's shop, getting haircuts and Maggie crawled over to the chair where her mama was sitting and that woman-baby picked up locks of hair on the floor and held them to her head as if trying to stick them on so that she, too, would have long lovely hair. 
Remember when she looked like this? 


It's hard to believe there was ever a time when Magnolia was a bald-headed baby. But she was the most adorable bald-headed baby in the world. 
Okay. I may be prejudiced. 
Don't you love Hank's typewriter tattoo? 

It's raining again. I just about burned a loaf of sourdough. I mean, it's on the edge. I don't know what's wrong with me. My pizza dough last night just would not cooperate. I've made pizza hundreds of times and this was the worst. I made two pies and this one insisted on being  heart-shaped. 


Sort of. At least it tasted okay and as you can see, had plenty of vegetables. 

I don't even know what to say about Trump these days. It would appear that he's flying off the rails and that new things are revealed daily showing what a horrible, lying, asshat piece of shit he is. I keep wondering if all of the people who think that Coronavirus is a hoax are re-thinking their positions with the knowledge that Trump lied to them. 
I doubt it. 
I can't even begin to discuss his using the DOJ to defend him in a rape case. 

Let's see what tomorrow brings. May the gods help us. 

Love...Ms. Moon

24 comments:

  1. It is just amazing to see Maggie’s child face appear from her baby face. Does that make sense? She is so spectacularly her own self and now her face matches.

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    1. Yes. That makes all the sense in the world. I see it happening in August too and it's just so...real.

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  2. Even mild depression hits us all.....especially with all else going on, which just exacerbates it. You are not alone, but I do feel for you greatly, especially since it has been with you for so long, At least you acknowledge it and *can* live with it....hoping for better times. A heart shaped pizza? What could be better? Looks fantastic. And thanks to Steve that you were able to show the loveliness of that banana blossom.
    Maggie....what a beauty. Her curls will grow back and she will again be the madonna of the world that she truly is
    Much love and a big hug to you
    Susan M

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    1. I tell you what- I'm grateful for mild depression. It beats the hell out of a major depression and it's evil twin, anxiety. I'm so grateful for Steve telling me how to manipulate my pictures. Now if I'd just take a picture of something worth enlarging it would be really cool.
      Magnolia was a beauty when she didn't have any hair and she's a beauty now. Our darling little woman-baby.

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  3. I mostly cannot think about Trump, unless I want to be sick.How can the west coast vote if it is burning.

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    1. Damn, woman. You bring up a good point and I do not know.

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  4. I'm with Joanne in that I mostly try not to think about Trump. I'm rarely successful at it though. I've run out of words to express how much I despise that horrible piece of human garbage. I could scream with frustration some days.

    But oh, that sweet baby Maggie face! What a little doll.

    I hope tomorrow is better for you, dear Mary.

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    1. The English language is not adequate to describe the despicable piece of shit that Trump is. Maybe in Klingon there are some words that would work.
      Isn't Maggie a doll?
      Thank you, Jennifer.

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  5. What a sweet face, now and then. I can't think about the orange intestine. I hope tomorrow is a better day for both of us.

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  6. Who made Maggie's hat? It frames her face perfectly.

    Julia

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    1. I think her other grandma made it. She's a wonder with the crochet hook.

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  7. I wondered if you would get round to the recent revelations regarding your beloved president. His stifling of the truth about coronavirus has literally killed people. No gun involved, no knife, no lethal injection but killing just the same. Can the right wing nutcases really feel okay about voting for a murderer - even if he has a fake tan and fake hair?

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    1. Trump lied and almost 200,000 people have died. And yes, the right wing nutcases are just going to double down as far as I can tell.

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  8. Yay! I'm glad the picture advice helped!

    Banana flowers look positively prehistoric, don't they? I love Maggie's yellow hat! It's so interesting to see how she's matured. And yes, I love Hank's typewriter tattoo.

    As for your pizza, at least it tasted good. The shape doesn't matter -- and if you're going to have a weird-shaped pizza, a heart isn't so bad!

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    1. They DO look prehistoric! You're right!
      Maggie's growing up so fast. It's frightening and it's wonderful and I don't even know what to think about it. Makes my heart ache.
      Heart-shaped pizza is okay. And it did taste good.

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  9. At least the pizza sent you a love message! Gotta take what we can get, yes? And then there is Maggie beguiling you with her looks. A couple of good things in your day.

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    1. I love how you put it- the pizza sent me a love message.
      There are always good things in my day. And I know that. And it helps.

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  10. I look at Maggie sometimes and simply know she is a magical being. She holds her own, for sure. These are such strange times indeed. I am frankly struggling, too. Every day a new assault on our psyches. I have pulled into my shell, but its dark and moody in here, and I shall have to emerge sooner or later, whether the psychic wounds are sufficiently tended or not. I've been feeling quiet, and to be honest, not a little scared of what's yet to come. I ask myself so many times a day, is this real life? I love you.

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    1. I'm sorry you're struggling, sweet friend. I feel exactly like you- pulled into my shell. I'm beginning to wonder if I'll ever find my way out. And again, like you, I constantly wonder if all of this is real. How can it be?
      I love you so.

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  11. well, I don't feel depressed but my afib is acting up even on the medication.

    not only did Trump know in January how devastating the virus is but now he's trying to blame Woodward for not coming forward with the info as if it's his fault Trump lied to us all for months and is still lying about it. I shared a piece on FB about the shifting of blame and my one and only cousin commented some bizarre thing about what would I prefer, our god given republic or a socialist dictatorship a la Marx, Stalin, and Hitler (Biden being the dictator). I've argued with him before about our socialist democracy but I just couldn't address that it was so patently insane. so I blocked him.

    your pizza dough may not have cooperated but it sure looks good.

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    1. Glad you blocked your cousin. That is one good thing about FB. If you don't want to deal with someone it's easy to get rid of them. Unlike in "real" life.
      Trump blaming Woodward is about as stupid as anything else he's ever done.
      That pizza was good.

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  12. I've been depressed since I was eight years old. It's part of who I am now and I do struggle with it. Some days are better than others. But I also feel joy and happiness and I know you do too. My depression never keeps me in bed but it has tried to kill me a couple of times. It's such an asshole:)

    Sending hugs and love.

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    1. I read your description of your depression and I nodded my head. Exactly the same with me. It does seem like it wants to kill me sometimes but by god, I always get out of bed.
      Love you, Lilycedar.

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Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.