Saturday, December 24, 2022

A Christmas Eve Story

Florida Ice Storm

What a day. I'd say that this is a Christmas Eve we won't soon forget but the way my memory is failing these days I can't really make that statement with any certainty.

Mr. Moon planned to get up this morning at some ungodly hour to go duck hunt. I asked him to please not go. It was going to be so cold. Why? Why? WHY?
"I'll be fine!" he said. "It was colder than this in Canada."
Whatever. Okay. Fine. Go ahead. If the man loves something that much he should do it. 

So he kissed me goodbye when he left and I mumbled something like, "Please be careful," or perhaps it was, "Please don't kill yourself out there." He laughed and said he wouldn't. 

Well. Spoiler alert- he didn't. Die, that is. He did not die.

However, when I woke up, I found that my phone had like three texts and two missed phone calls because I turn the sound off at night. Which I now realize is stupid. 
The texts were from Glen as well as one of the phone calls, and another call was from Jessie. 
He was in the ER. 
FUCK! 
I called him immediately and yes, he was in the free-standing ER where I'd gone with my appendix which is an excellent place to go if you need medical attention. The reason he was there was because he'd passed out in the duck blind.
Now. My husband does occasionally pass out. I've seen him do it a couple of times. It is generally associated with too much constriction around his waist and low blood pressure. Also, sometimes, the sight of blood. He knows he's going to do it, he announces it, and then he does it. Seeing an almost seven-foot man keel over is scary. But he's always fine afterwards and I've learned not to get overly excited about it although I definitely do not like it. 
So there he was in the duck blind with about four different garments around his waist because of long underwear, etc., and he announced that he was going to pass out and he did and it freaked out his friends so much, never having witnessed this before, that they did the right thing and took him to the ER where he was admitted. His blood pressure was fine by then, his oxygen levels were good, his cardiac enzymes didn't indicate a thing that was worrisome. They did a CT scan to see if he had a clot. He was hooked up to an EKG monitor. By the time I got there, he was extremely ready to get out. Not that it wasn't a pleasant place to be with all the nurses and techs wearing antlers and santa hats, etc., and the smell of delicious foods simmering in crockpots, but the gurney he was on was not nearly long enough for him and also it was getting boring. 
So the doctor came in with the news that the CT scan was clear and that everything looked fine but that he should get with his GP about getting a stress test. My man agreed that he would and the doctor gave me a penetrating glare as if to say- make sure he does!- and said we could go. 

So off we went, back into the cold and of course he drove and we had to pick up his truck but he was hungry so we stopped at a Cajun restaurant and had lunch as it was afternoon by this time. There he was, dressed in his camo, while I was in my overalls, Goodwill cashmere, Crocs, and black velvet coat. 
We fit right in. 

He was extremely cheerful and I was thankful. After lunch we picked up his truck and he drove off to Costco to buy me some new AirPods because one of mine stopped working yesterday and I could not get it to work no matter what I did and I live with those things in my ears and he wanted to get me another pair. Well, okay. To be completely truthful I said I wanted another pair and would stop at Costco on my way home to get them but he insisted on doing it and he did and he's fine. He's sitting in his chair, watching TV, napping on and off, and staying warm. 

All of the presents are wrapped, the new pods work beautifully, I've cooked the sausage and made the dough for tomorrow's sausage and cheese bread. We'll be meeting up with the kids and grands tomorrow around 10:00 for breakfast and presents. Rachel and Hank won't be there because as I said a few days ago, they have taken themselves off on a little beach getaway. 


They report that they are having a wonderful time although it's a bit chilly on the beach. Like, with the windchill factor, 34 degrees. Don't go swimming, Hank and Rachel! A shark might eat you for your nice warm blood!

So that's my Christmas Eve story and I know I should feel all grateful and like I now know the true meaning of Christmas (husband did not die) but I am a complete and utter Bitch Grinch and mostly I just wish he'd listened to me and stayed in our warm bed under the duck with Jack cuddled up between us. I have a feeling that even if the sweet Baby Jesus showed up at my house and gave me some of the frankincense and myrrh his mother couldn't use, I'd still be a Bitch Grinch. 
Although truly, I am so grateful that I probably can't admit it, even to myself. I can't imagine life without him and I do not want to.

And here, for your Christmas pleasure- the statue thing that came with this house and which now resides in the guest room in front of the fireplace. 


I do love it, especially the aforementioned Sweet Baby Jesus who looks so incredibly pissed off. 
"Really?" he is saying. "Do I have to? Come on, Dad, you're God. Couldn't you have just one more begotten son?"
Mary looks pretty good for having just given birth to an eighteen month old, doesn't she?

All right, y'all. Hope you get good sleep despite all the dancing of sugar plums going on in your head, and wake up to find that Santa has been to visit you with a sack full of Christmas magic and joy. 

Or, you know, a ham or a turnip or something. 

Love...Ms. Moon









 

42 comments:

  1. Well that was a roller coaster of a day. Glad everyone is okay!

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  2. Well , That is one heluva chrismas eve! Tomorrow will be better, promise! Gloria in excelsis deo - never understood that to mean what it is supposed to mean. sounds to me like Gloria is stuck in packing material. Our Christmas eve has been cancelled until boxing day...

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    1. "Gloria is stuck in packing material..." Yes!
      Oh dear. Your Christmas has been a true lesson in not always being able to get what you want, hasn't it? I surely hope you have gotten a least a little bit of what you need.

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  3. A Christmas Eve to remember! So very happy he’s ok. Maybe his blood sugar was a little low? That used to make me occasionaly keel over, and like Mr Moon, I could feel it coming on and get horizontal and not hit my head on anything.
    Hope there’s much laughter and joy tomorrow. Much love.
    Xoxo
    Barbara

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    1. Well, he'd eaten a biscuit with egg and cheese so I don't think it was blood sugar.
      There was a lot of laughter and joy today. And love, too.

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  4. I'm so sorry for his friends to have witnessed that. It would be scary. Glad he's okay though and maybe he shouldn't go out again in such cold weather. Merry Christmas.

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    1. There was even a doctor there! So he was well-taken care of but it did freak out his friend. Merry Christmas!

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  5. Glad there was a happy ending to the Christmas Eve day saga. As I always say.... enough of that nonsense! Us old folks have our limits. Have a Merry Holiday!
    Paranormal John

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    1. Yes! Enough of this nonsense! Merry Holiday to you too, John!

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  6. I am having a Christmas Eve meltdown. We tried to FaceTime with our four-year-old great grandson today and the sound wouldn’t work. He couldn’t figure out why we weren’t talking to him, and when granddaughter announced it wasn’t working we had to hang up. Ten minutes later she posted a video of him on Facebook….’mama help me find my shoes. I gotta find my GiGi and PawPaw.’ I broke out in tears and have been crying off and on ever since. Was a no-show for two get-togethers this evening so I could sit around in my flannel jammies sniffling….

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    1. Well that is just heartbreaking. I am so sorry. Damn technology when it doesn't do what it's supposed to do. Are you okay now?

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  7. I think the picture of Hank and Rachel is perfect. I've read some pretty scary Christmas Eve stories tonight, and you take the cake that isn't even baked. Merry, merry Christmas!

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    1. Some weird shit going on this Christmas, don't you think? I hope your day was splendid!

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  8. Uffda - that is way too much for your anxiety to deal with. I'm so glad Mr. Moon is okay. And I hope a good night's sleep helps.

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    1. Oh, a good night's sleep helped everything. Thank you.

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  9. I'm glad the Mister is ok. Men!!
    Merry Christmas & enjoy yourself:)

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  10. Well, I guess it's good that he's not dead. Did you threaten to kill him?
    I'm glad it all ended up ok but that's stressful, for both of you.

    We opened our presents this evening and I have to say it was one of the most unpleasant experiences I've had at Christmas. Jack was like a savage, ripping paper, running around, not listening, like a three year old. I know. But it was not nice. He was tipped over into sensory overload and I didn't realize how bad until we started opening gifts. Sigh.

    He goes to his other grandma's in the morning so they can deal with what will be sensory overload x10 because they don't hold back on presents. I'm just glad it's over.

    Sending hugs to you and I hope Mr. Moon doesn't ever do that again.

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    1. I did not threaten to kill him. I didn't even bust into his room at the ER shouting, "I TOLD you not to go!"
      I am so sorry that Jack is being a wild man. It does happen. Poor little guy and mostly poor Grandma and Grandpa. I wonder how it went at other G's today.
      If Mr. Moon never does that again it'll be wonderful. Jeez.

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  11. And Merry Christmas, I forgot that:)

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  12. Glad Don is okay and hope you have a fun day tomorrow!

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  13. Oh good heavens. What a day! Bottom line Mr Moon home and doing ok and that is really what matters most. I am stunned at the breadth (sp) of your day. I think Ativan or a HUGE martini might be in order. Love and wishes for a calmer day tomorrow...... bless you all
    Susan M

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    1. Martini's tonight- hurray! Christmas martini's! Bless you too, Susan.

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  14. Sheesh - I expected the helluva story to be about your arctic chill ( those are some impressive icicles!), but Mr Moon in the ER surpasses that. Glad - SO glad - that all is well. May tomorrow be just another great family day, and I agree that’s a perfect photo of Hank and Rachel.

    Chris from Boise

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    1. The arctic chill was pretty impressive. It's still going on. Of course it's nothing like it is say, in Buffalo, but it's cold for us.

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  15. I'm sorry you had such a scary and tiring day, I do hope the 25th is a wonderful time for you all. Freezing and falling at almost 3 AM.I am still hopeful for some sweet dreams and wish you the same.

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    1. All is now pretty darn good, e. I hope you have a very fine day for you and your beloved familiar.

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  16. FRESCA here:
    Aw, man.
    Welp, clean bill of health for Christmas,
    I hope it's a smashing day!
    XO Fresca

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    1. Yep. No heart attack and no blood clot so we're happy about that. It has been a very good day.

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  17. I keep the sound on and loud during the night for just this reason. Had it been me rushing to the emergency room the first thing out of my mouth would have been goddammit I told you not to go! So when he faints does he slump down into a puddle or keel over like a cut down tree? Timbeeeer! Well, I'm glad all is well and he just had the vapors. Kidding, kidding! I'm such a card.

    Merry merry whatever. The best thing about this day is that all those christmas commercials, oh the poor animals!, will be over. I think I despise those commercials the most perpetuating that this day is supposed to be the most magical of any day and you get your heart's desire and if you don't then you were just too naughty. I'm Bitch Grinching right with you.

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    1. Girl- I had to restrain myself from yelling that at him. He sort of slumps because he knows he's about to do it. Otherwise, he'd kill himself falling from that height.
      I don't watch TV that has commercials except for the occasional episode of Jeopardy so I haven't had to watch that mess. Thank goodness!
      And it surely is fine to have a sister Bitch Grinch. Thanks!

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  18. Oh good lord. I thought I had domestic drama, but I can't hold a candle to this! I'm so glad Mr. Moon is OK, but I can also see why you'd feel a bit of "I told you so"! Thank goodness he's home safely and I hope you can now enjoy a more peaceful Christmas with two earpods and no ERs.

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    1. Yes. Things have smoothed out considerably here in Lloyd. Thank the sweet lord baby Jesus. Right?

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  19. 37paddington:
    I’m glad Mr. Moon is ok but dear Lord those must have been terrifying texts to wake up to. All’s well that ends well, though I can well understand the shadow this cast over your day. I hope by now everything is sunny and bright and not too cold and the grandkids are all zooming around happily, enjoying their loot. Merry Christmas Moons! I adore your family!

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    1. I was not completely terrified because I know this scenario. Scary to see but really, it passes and he's fine. Still, I do not recommend waking up like that. It was a beautiful day here. Cold but sunny. I adore your family too!

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  20. Merry Christmas. Enjoy the love.

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