Thursday, November 8, 2012

Tomorrow I'll Discuss Religion

I'm sure you've seen this, right?



White People Mourning Romney ?

I'm sorry. I told you I was mean. Plus, I'm too tired to give a shit. It's not even really that funny. It's sad. Here's what's making me laugh today- the octillions of dollars that Republicans poured into the election which did not manage to buy them SHIT this time.

Fuck you, Koch Brothers!

Get OUTTA HERE, Karl Rove! No, seriously. GET OUT! Oh yeah, it was because of the Latinos, right, that your guy lost? Okay. Sure. Could be. Latinos aren't stupid!

Can you imagine what the election would have looked like without the infusion of corpuscular gelt from the Republican heads of corporations? I'm not saying that Obama probably didn't get money from some Pretty Big Guys too, but come on. These Republican donors were shameless and they got bupkis for their investments.
Meanwhile, I donated my 100 dollars to Obama and got a bumper sticker and a magnetic tag! And my man won!

Who's the fiscal genius now, Sheldon Adelson?

Okay. I'm sorry. I'm just a tired old grandma who needs to go put the toys away and wash the dishes. And yes, I remember when GW won for the second time (or was it really the first?) and how I felt. I remember what I felt like when Ronald Reagan, The Very Sincere And Bad Actor, won. Hell. I remember when RICHARD NIXON WON!  It wasn't good. But you know what? The unbelievably virulent nasty lies the right wingers have been yelling about Obama have just pushed me over the edge. Sure, Bush was a former drug abuser and drunk who couldn't speak English but I was judging him on his policies and ability to be president. People are freaking out. Like- they think the Rapture's about to happen now.
Where do they come up with this shit? If I have any complaints about his first term, it's that he wasn't nearly as liberal as I hoped he'd be.
But you know me- old hippie. Peace, love, rock and roll. Tree hugger. Still got my love beads.
(That's a lie. I don't even know what love beads are. Never did, either.)
But as far as I can tell, no one's come to get the hunting rifles yet and no one's forcing me to attend Muslim services and even if I needed one, I doubt I could get a free abortion.

So what the fuck?

All right. I better go put those toys away and wash the dishes. I guess Mr. Moon made it to Canada. I haven't heard from him since he got to Minnesota. I hope he doesn't freeze to death. It's supposed to be in the below-zero temperatures where he's going and his blood is pretty thin. He should have kept all his facial hair if you ask me, but no one did.

And guess what? Owen pooped in the potty at my house today. He wanted to go outside but his mother stopped him and forced him into the bathroom. I just sat there and laughed. If he ever has to go to a therapist to talk about how his potty training traumatized him, it won't be my fault.

Anyway, let's pull it together, people. Let's quit talking about the Rapture and let's all simmer down, now. It's going to be all right. No one is going to take "In God We Trust" off the money. Not that I'd care.

Here's one of my favorite things I've seen on the internet today:



Love...Ms. Moon

16 comments:

  1. Yeah, i loved the White People Mourning Romney too.

    I'm disillusioned to learn you're such a mean lady. It's really thrown me for a loop. I'm a bit distressed about it. I thought i should tell you.

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  2. Yay for the pot! I hope that this breaks his phobia for using the pot away from the house.

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  3. I like the Obama-Hills thang. Pretty cute.

    Yes, there is a whole lot of bile producing fear out there. Makes people believe the strangest things.

    A hard as it is, lately I have been trying to hold it together around the conservative people I know so that they can see that we are not three headed serpents trying to corrupt the world with our loose morals... but it usually doesn't work. Oh well, at least I didnt call any of them to gloat... That's good, right?

    xo

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  4. Ajax- Yes. My feet are clay. But my calves are cut from marble. Hahahahahahahaha!

    Kristin- I think it's a process. We are in it. I feel certain that by college he will be completely potty trained.

    Ms. Fleur- Hell, let's allow them to believe we're all crazy immoral three-headed serpents. They'll sleep better at night.

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  5. Hahahaha! I was laughing all the way through this. You are just a sublime crank. So freakin on the money! And you know, one if the things I adore about Obama is they way he and Hillary became cohorts. To me, that spoke volumes about the two of them. So I loved that meme.

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  6. Where I live no one is talking politics. They just don't say a thing. Not a damn thing.

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  7. Oh Mrs. Moon, that is a heartfelt, funny-serious post that made me laugh and almost cry.
    The times they are a changin'.
    Hooray Barack!
    Hooray Hilary!
    Hooray, you.

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  8. Love the "White People" blog. I love all this apocalyptic talk from the right about how the country has been seized by Satan and minorities. Those right-wingers are WACK.

    There is a special delight in the thought of all the millions those guys wasted on this race. Unfortunately, they have money to burn. To them it's just a drop in the bucket.

    And yes, Hillary in 2016!

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  10. I could not love that Hillary thing more. It is quite possibly my favorite thing in the entire world! Love it.

    Owen and pooping in the potty. Well, I doubt he'll be too traumitized. And I enjoy the updates in a purely pure way. Keep them coming.

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  11. Hil is so fab-o at her job now, that I hope that despite saying she'll quit after first term she reconsiders. She's really amazing out and about in the world - she keeps an incredibly grueling schedule I could never keep up with, and her skills are unrivaled.

    But if she needs to slow it down for 2016, I understand. But I'll be sad for the world. That presidential campaigning is such ridiculous nonsense and a huge waste of time and money when there's real work to be done in the world.

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  12. Love this post, love you too.

    xo

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  13. Need I say it? I LOVE THIS POST.

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  14. ......and you are nowhere near as mean as I am.

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  15. Someone wrote that they would like to know where BO keeps his prayer rug. I loved this post. You nailed it--and those investors in the Mittless are pretty steamed over his losing. I'm so happy that we have another four years of Mr. Obama.

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  16. Angella- You're right. They started out as competitors for the same job but now they're working together so beautifully. That DOES speak volumes. I am a crank, aren't I?

    Rubye Jack- That is so weird.

    Denise- And hooray, YOU!

    Steve-In my perfect world, that's how it goes.

    Jill- Poor Owen. I shouldn't be telling all these tales about him.

    NOLA- I agree. We should come up with a better method of choosing our new daddy. Oh wait. I mean, our new president.

    Mel- That makes me happy.

    Lo- Let's have a meanness contest.

    Syd- His prayer rug? Gawd. What imbeciles. And you know what? I would not care if he DID have one. And used it.

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Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.