Dense and gray and maybe we'll get rain. Maybe? Meanwhile, the gray presses down like an old quilt with the stuffing coming out, gray too, that stuffing, very uncomfortable.
Ache, ache, ache. That is my body's song. All night I wake and ache. My new neighbors leave their lights on most of the night and they shine in my window and I have to get blinds or something because I can't sleep with light shining into my window. It's one of my number one things I hate. Until I figure out the blinds thing, I am going to sleep in the guest room and that's all there is to it.
This is what my life has come down to at this point- sleep.
Well, I am a fortunate one. I have another bed.
But today I am going to town. Yes. Yes. Going to go see Lily and the boys and go to Target. Lily's dishwasher ate a piece of her pumping mechanism and we must buy a new one. Then maybe lunch. Then a little babysitting. Power Rangers will be involved. See? I have a life.
This is why my blogging has been off. I have nothing to say. Literally. Nothing. No one wants to read about someone else's gray sky.
This is the season of gray skies and pressing-down. This is the time of three-eggs-in-the-nest being the best of the day. These are the days of light coming into my bedroom window waking me up to the ache, to the memory of the light shining into my room through the curtains from where the man sits in front of the TV, he and I the only ones awake in the dread house, his dead eyes watching...what? My heart pounding.
Well. Things change and I know that and they do and they will. But why does memory have to retain what is so long gone?
If I live to be a thousand (oh, god, please no) I will never understand this.