Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Corniest Hunting Poem Ever Written

Mr. Moon has gone away
He left the house before the break of day
He took his guns, his boots, his camo,
He took his bow, he took his ammo
He's gone to hunt in Tennessee
And the only thing he didn't take was me.

I got up this morning before the sun was up
To make his breakfast and fill his coffee cup
I held the door while he loaded his gear
I cooked his eggs while he dreamed of deer
The deer he'll hunt in Tennessee
The deer he'll hunt while away from me.

It's strange to be in an empty house
Just me and the dogs and occasional mouse
It's quiet and it's warm and it's cold outside
And for six days now it'll be a solo ride
Because Mr. Moon's headed to Tennessee
In a car that's traveling north without me.

When the babies were young and so was I
I resented these trips and would often cry
Because I hated the thought that he'd left our home
To go off to hunt, all alone
But now when he heads up to Tennessee
I'm fine with the fact that he doesn't take me.

Because he's that sort of man who has to go
To the woods to hunt; he loves it so
And I like the quiet of the peaceful home
While he's gone to the Tennessee woods to roam
And I've sent him with love off to Tennessee
Because I know he'll return when he's done, to me.

And while he's gone I'll write and read
I'll walk, I'll yoga, I have everything I need
In our sweet little house under the oaks right here
While he's off to the woods to hunt white-tailed deer
At night maybe I'll dream of him in Tennessee
And I hope while he's there he will dream of me.

15 comments:

  1. What is it about men and hunting? We are in the midst of hunting season, and there is so much gunfire that I'm half afraid to go outside. It's a rite of passage here in West Virginia. Schools and some businesses close so that men can shoot deer.

    I think it's the male flip side of female shopping hysteria -- hunters vs gatherers.

    Your Mr. Moon is genetically programmed to hunt while you nest. And if he doesn't bag one in Tennessee, he can come up to my back yard and get his quota.

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  2. I thought it was a wonderful poem - kinda made me teary. Well, it seems lots of things have that affect on me lately. ha. enjoy a little distance cause its always real nice to come back together:)

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  3. That was a very nice poem.I had an uncle and two cousins at Thanksgiving this year that took a break from deer hunting to be with us.
    And Mr. Moon has to stand in a tree to hunt? Couldn't he just stand on his tippy-toes?

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  4. Ms. Nanny- Listen- Mr. Moon would totally take you up on that. And yes, he's the hunter. Unfortunately, I'm not much of a gatherer these days. Unless you're speaking of words. Those I gather. And then scatter.

    Ms. P- Yep. It'll be nice when he gets home. Last night before we went to sleep he said, "I'm already looking forward to coming home. Isn't that weird?" I thought it was sweet.

    Jon- I have no idea about any of this hunting stuff. He did not take that deer stand. It's set up in my side yard for target practice. Don't ask me.
    When he talks to me about hunting, it's like when he talks about his car and it sounds just like when an adult speaks on the Charley Brown specials. "Blah, blah, blah."
    I TRY to pay attention but seem to be congenitally unable.
    BTW- I think we're going to rock that play.

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  5. I just think that's a darn sweet little poem. :) And he has to go in order to be glad when he gets back. Don't we all at times? ;)

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  6. Nice.
    May he have a good trip and kill lots of neat white paper packages for the freezer.
    And a softer man would use a 30/30; Mr. Moon's got himself a bow!

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  7. I am sooo glad this hunting season madness is over! 9 days of drunk men in orange running around with guns is enough to make me a little nervous. And that's saying something, since I spend 37.5 hours per week with the severely mentally ill.

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  8. Lopo- YES!

    Magnum- he has a gun, too. Believe me.

    Rachel- I'm sorry. Geez. But please know that Mr. Moon would no more drink in the woods while hunting than...well, I can't think of anything that he would be less likely to do. The man knows when it's time to drink and when it's not.

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  9. More like best hunting poem ever written...

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  10. I admire the fact that he hunts with a bow, it kind of gives the deer a fighting chance. Although they're multiplying like rodents and hunting them any way you can, if you eat the meat, is needed.

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  11. Yay a poem! :D That was lovely!

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  12. Gosh I love that poem. So true, so corny and good.
    I like those very manly pictures, by the way. Did he make you take those, or did you ask him to pose for the blog? I will never forget taking his and Lon's picture in front of the convertible. He made Lon neal on one knee next to him. It still gives me the giggles.

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  13. MOB- we definitely eat that deer.

    HoneyLuna- No. I snuck out and took those pictures. He just looked so cute up there in his "man beater" as he calls it. Your daddy's SO PC as you know.
    But yep, he's a hoot when Big Lou's around.

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  14. That was realy sweet, actually. I love poetry that rhymes!

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  15. Ms. Lemon- I do too! I know it's somehow inferior to the kind that does not, but I like it anyway and it's fun to write.

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