Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Not Quite A Rant, More Like A Theory


I'm pretty sure I've written about cloth diapers before and God knows I've written about childbirth but I'm too lazy to go back to see what I said and if I don't remember, maybe you don't either.
The above picture is one of my favorites and yes, it's a lousy replication. Sorry.
But that's a shot of HoneyLuna when she was a tiny little blond thing waving at her beloved Paw-Paw who was surf fishing. She is wearing, as you can see, a soggy, saggy cloth diaper. It was probably wet from ocean water and I probably just took it off of her and let her run around naked after that picture was taken. I don't remember but that's something I would have done.
When my first child was born, the Pamper had just been invented and it was a nasty thing made of paper and plastic and there was no way I was going to put that sort of uncomfortable thing on my baby. I wouldn't have worn it so why should he?
I used cloth diapers then and I used cloth diapers for all four of my kids, although I will admit to using disposable at night when the kids got older and the products got better. But for the most part, I used the old fashioned cotton diaper, prefolded and fastened with diaper pins.
How barbaric!
And yet, it worked for me.
Of course, this meant I had to rinse out baby poop in the TOILET and I had to wash all those diapers and dry and fold them. For the first two children I had no dryer and depended on line drying and somehow, that worked too.
This was just what you did back then. There were plastic pants that went over the diaper to prevent leakage when the child was wearing something over the diaper (like corduroy overalls- the cutest thing in the world that a child can wear- trust me on this) or if we were going to be somewhere that if a leak occurred, it would be awkward, such as the store.
No big deal.
And no, the cloth diapers didn't prevent leakage the way disposables do.
And yes, I had to change them EVERY TIME THE CHILD PEED OR POOPED which meant that on many days, I probably changed at least a dozen, maybe more, diapers.
Nowadays, the way they make those disposables with that magical stuff in them that takes the pee and turns it into a gel or something, you can get away with probably three changes a day. Maybe a week. I don't know.
But I do know that every diaper change was a chance at a little face-to-face interaction, a hug, a tickle, a kiss, a running-of-the-chubby-little-legs-like-a-bicycle, a giggle, a belly raspberry. In short, what we might call mommy (or daddy)-baby quality time that beats the hell out of a Baby Einstein video. All in the name of a dry bottom.
I wonder if anyone's done a study to determine if the decrease in the number of these interactions are affecting our babies' development.
I doubt it.
The diaper companies certainly wouldn't pay for it.
And that is the main reason I think cloth diapers are superior to disposables. Is that crazy?
I mean, yes, I think cloth is better for the environment and it's got to be a hell of a lot cheaper. Of course it's more work and you have to actually deal with baby poop on a whole different level if you rinse out the diaper in the toilet and flush it, which is how poop should be handled, if you think about it, rather than just folding that little plastic package up and throwing it away.
Which is far yickier if you ask me than flushing. In the long run, at least. Think of all the baby poop in landfills.
Or don't.
But you know, this is how we are these days- we don't deal with things on the level that people used to. We don't raise our own food or butcher our own animals or pluck our own chickens or make our own clothes or chop our own wood. We don't like to get our hands dirty or deal with blood or poop or pee.
Or pain.
And I'm pretty much down with that.
But I wonder how it's affecting us. Technologically, we are so much farther advanced than we are biologically. It's one of the reasons obesity is so prevalent. We're still wired to need just a few more calories than we would expend in obtaining food energy. Think of how hard people used to have to work to get a meal on the table. Between the growing or raising of it, the hauling water, the chopping wood to cook it on, the hauling of the wood, etc., you were damn lucky if you could get enough to eat to offset what it took to get it from the ground to the body. Or from the woods to the body.
And now, we only have to walk from the closest parking space we can find to the door at Publix, into the store and around it to gather what we need to bring home and pop in the microwave and cook it. We can even buy prechopped vegetables, for God's sake! Who doesn't have the time to cut up an onion?
Well. That's another rant for another day.
But all of this is leading me up to childbirth which we now go through painlessly as a matter of course. I don't know who doesn't get an epidural these days.
And I just can't help but think that there's something wrong with being in heavy labor and watching television at the same time.
Not that I think that pain is absolutely a good thing- I do not.
But in the case of childbirth, I have come to believe it has a lot to do with the way a mother feels about her child, which is that as soon as the child is born, the pain is over, and the vast and amazing relief from that pain is associated with the child, making that baby all the more precious on some level that I'm sure our ape-mothers would understand, even if we don't.
Anything that takes THAT much effort to produce is worth watching out for and protecting.
But we don't honor that anymore and in doing so, we lose a lot, I think. We lose the knowledge we gain when we have gone through childbirth unmedicated about how strong and powerful our bodies are.
If there is anything more empowering than delivering a normal-sized infant without drugs, I have yet to experience it.
So. From cloth diapers to natural childbirth.
They are related. And breastfeeding is in there too. Because all three of these things take a hell of a lot more effort but somehow, some way, they all three help foster a connection between a mother and a baby that nothing else can.
We have evolved as mammals in such a way to ensure that babies get born and nurtured and raised to adulthood so that they can have their own babies.
And that's my theory and I'm sticking to it.

14 comments:

  1. Plus, is there any better cleaning rag than an old diaper?

    Oh, and changing a cloth diaper is like riding a bike - I am sure I could still do it easily, though I haven't since Jesster last wore them.

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  2. I still have 2 of those pins. I remember getting my first package of diapers at my first baby shower and for some reason they were the one gift that made that baby seem real. I kept taking them out and looking at them in wonder.

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  3. I have pins AND diapers.
    I think getting a washing machine (very much used) because I knew I was going to need one to wash diapers is what made me feel like an adult. And I was all of 21...

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  4. I went to the laundromat with diapers for a year, and I remember getting that first used washer, too, and I must've been 22 by then. Even getting my first Mac cannot compare with that. I didn't care if I had to hang out the diapers in January, when it got pretty durned cold in Central Florida. Never occurred to me to get a dryer, too. Having the washer was such a luxury!

    But from there, there's been more washers, and dryers, and cars, and all the other stuff that needs to be maintained, and now I feel that being an adult who has to maintain this stuff sucks. I feel like throwing out everything. Now this is seeming more like a rant. Back to your theory, Ms. M. I like it.

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  5. I think about how ridiculous it is that when I drive to the grocery store, I look for the closest spot to park, every single time., I am conscious of how silly it is, but I do it anyway.

    Hi Ms. Moon. :)

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  6. I think I used a few disposables on baby girl, but 95% of the time, it was cloth, and washing poop, and mushing food, and oh hell, after 3 years of Mr. Mom, I can hold my own in this rant.

    Well, until it comes to the actual stuff, like Birth, which I was witness to, but of no use.

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  7. Hey to you, Nicol!
    Magnum- you da man! And I'll bet you were actually quite a bit of help during the birth.

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  8. Gosh I love this topic. Ever since I was a baby in cloth diapers (*evidence in the photo), I've been keen on hearing about babies and the more natural way of taking care of them.
    Hey, I didn't know that Downtown Guy used to change my diapers. I guess I've never really thought about that. Thanks for doing that brother. And thanks, Mama, for raising us so right, with all the extra hard work and time. I really appreciate it.

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  9. ooo yes!

    I was just coming on over here to ask you all about these cloth diapers again because I keep having more questions, but look, a RANT! I love your rants, keep em coming.

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  10. Theories equate to rants. Rants equate to truth. At least in my book. And not to take anything away from anybody else, but I did the cloth diaper thing without my own washer and dryer with twins. That was a mighty big diaper pail that got lugged to the laundromat and a heckuva lot of flushing poop down the toilet. When babygirl arrived while twin brothers were still in diapers, I admit to lusting after Pampers and using them at least part of the time.

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  11. As the economy (finally) crumbles and my life crumbles in so many ways as well, unrelated to the economy but more ominous with it as backdrop, I am thinking lately about comfort and hardship. Of the people around me who live only for comfort and pleasure. How I was forced to learn to live with pain, and also how much worse it could be. Not that that's always a comfort. But it makes me want to cultivate strength and simplicity and be ready for things to get harder. Just in case. But definitely to be amazed all the more at the existence (that I may have gotten sucked up into, things being different) of fancy dinners out, activities to entertain, swept from one afternoon to evening do-up, none satisfying me. And I realize (although it isn't always a consolation either, but it is what I live for) that the only thing that matters is the people you love. In a crumbling world it is absolutely the only thing that matters. And we sit on the couch, watching the crazy people talk on the tv, and bemoan the loss of interaction, of family and not just conservative-shadows of what "family" is (thinking of Palin here), and just at the madness, the wrong-mindedness of it all. And I think, driving on the beltway amongst all the DC commuters, what if things really do start crumbling. What if their comfort is yanked, their fancy dinners, their technological recreation, their distractions. Good lord they'll just be left alone with their thoughts then. Without the "pleasures" they're using to distract themselves from the things that do bother them, will it just be madness in the streets. More madness for us to watch on our television, holding each other in pain and love, saying aren't we glad, as we just might be the only two sane people left in the world, but aren't we so glad to have each other and actually know how lucky we are for it.

    Thank you so much for the card. It's up on my shelf. Thank you so very very much. Honestly, at some of the toughest times, your support does give me strength. So much strength when I haven't even met you. Thank you for that.
    Seriously. :)

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  12. Quiet Girl- you are exactly right. We have to hold on to what is real- the ones we love.
    Tightly.

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  13. Brings back memories. I used cloth diapers too, with pins, and rubber pants. Those old rubber pants were good at keeping smells in but once change time happened, out the smell came. Rubber pants off, unlatch diaper pins and remove diaper, a clean diaper under the bottom, a dash of powder, a pin on each side of the diaper, and the same rubber pants pulled back on again over the baby's feet, up their legs, and over top of their diapers!

    Marlene.

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  14. Marlene- They have a new little device which holds the cloth diaper in place without pins and I have to say it's fine and fancy and works really well. I still sort of miss the pins though.
    http://www.globalenfant.com/snappi-diaper-fastener-size-1-single-pack-p-333.html?utm_source=googlebase&utm_medium=comparsionshopping&utm_campaign=organic_baby_products_ge

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Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.