Friday, January 18, 2008

And Then....

Another good one died last night of another deadly neurological disease. My brother-in-law, my husband's sister's husband. He was less than one year from diagnosis to death, I think. ALS. Lou Gehrig's Disease. Let me tell you- it's not a good way to die.
Ron was a huge man, over six feet five and had two enormously tall sons and was as good a father and husband as anyone I ever met. Gentle and kind (as men of his size so often are), loving, funny, and just pure of heart.
He'd gotten to the feeding-tube/respirator stage of his disease and suddenly, last night, his blood pressure dropped and his respirations increased. They took him to the ER and he was dead within a few hours, leaving his wife in a S. Florida hospital, one moment a wife, the next a widow. They'd moved there recently and had no support system yet. Their sons were in other states, his sisters in Texas. He was retired, my sister-in-law had found a good job down there and planned to work for a few years before they settled into their long-dreamed of retirement in their nice home with a pool and a yard where they could grow citrus and palm trees.
She called my husband when Ron was admitted and so my man hit the road even before waiting to hear the outcome.
"Is it okay if I go?" he asked me and what could I say? Lynn's made the journey and he needed to be there for his sister. They're the only two left from his family and there was no decision to make except which shirts to pack.
I cried while I was making him some sandwiches and coffee, but I knew he had to go. He got the call that Ron had passed less than an hour after he left.
Death is taking no holidays around here.
But there sure are some beautiful souls adding their light to the universe. I'm trying hard to remember that.
Meanwhile, I'm thinking of Ron and how we sat on the beach at Dog Island a few years ago, watching the sunset and talking about the things that matter.
I would never have guessed. I would never have guessed.

5 comments:

  1. Oh, what a terrible week you are having. I'm so sorry for the multiple losses. January is a rough month, even in Florida. Some people who are close to death can hang on until Christmas and New Years are over...then they let go. I don't know what else to say.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I have thought about the post-holiday-passing syndrome a lot. I think it is probably true.
    And yes, even in Florida, January can be tough. It's cold (for us) and has been gray lately, every day. The yard is brown and I don't like brown.
    But today I saw a blooming redbud, which is always a sure sign that winter will not last forever.
    I was grateful for that.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I am so sorry to hear this Ms. Moon. My condolences to you and yours. Your post was very nice by the way and I know your brother-in-law would certainly appreciate it. Take care.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Thanks, Mr. Shife. Strange times. You take care, too.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I'm so sorry to hear that. I know it hasn't been the greatest week for you. Hang in there.

    ReplyDelete

Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.