Two Hugs

This is Sasha, the sweet dog who lives with a neighbor on the church side of us. As in, the church is right next door and the neighbor is right next door to that. Sasha has visited us twice before and I invited her in for a little exploration of the house which turned out not to be a good idea last time because Maurice did a full blown, full ninja leaping attack to her face with all twenty claws at the extended slasher position and teeth bared too. Remember that? 

So I didn't ask her in today although she did whimper when she stuck her head in. She trotted off and I called her caretaker who did not answer her phone but I left a message and then my other next-door neighbor called to ask me if I knew where this dog came from and that she'd seen it almost get hit crossing the street so I went down to Carolyn's (Sasha's caretaker) and got a leash from her. She answered the door when I knocked but only cracked it enough for us to barely talk through. She and her husband both have severe health problems and many other problems too, and I think there is probably some hoarding going on there and Carolyn didn't want me to see it. Or who knows? Maybe they have a pet lion. 
So I walked back to my OTHER neighbor's and she told me where she'd seen the dog last (across the street) but then, she told me that she'd lost her mother in October and I could not just walk away. We are not close with these neighbors except for in the physical sense, especially since they cut down all the bamboo between us. He's a Jefferson County Sheriff and I'm not sure what she does and we talk occasionally, but not a lot. Still- this is a woman who was obviously suffering some intense grief and she began to tell me the story of how her mother had died and what the last few months have been like for her and because I have been there and because I knew she needed to tell the story again, I listened and let the dog do what the dog would. I knew there was nothing I could say to assuage her grief but that listening and assuring her that everything she was feeling and doing were normal and to be gentle with herself and to not push herself were things she needed to hear. And Glen called twice while this was going on and I finally answered the phone and of course he had Sasha but my neighbor and I were not done with our encounter and that's all there was to it. I could not just walk away nor did I want to. When she had reached a point where I felt she'd said what she needed to say for that moment, I told her that although I knew there was nothing I could do, really, to make her feel better, I could give her a hug and she opened her arms to me and we did hug deeply and well and I kissed her cheek and told her if there was anything I could do to let me know. 
And THEN I went to get Sasha and take her home and that neighbor was now outside and we discussed how Sasha had been dumped at her house and how the dog was very good at getting out. And so forth. And then she gave ME a hug and that was nice, really. This is the neighbor who had all the Trump signs and with whom I had a few words years ago which didn't make either one of us feel better but really enough water has passed under that bridge and she and her husband are just obviously NOT doing well, and the Trump sign disappeared from her yard some time back and I was glad we hugged. I was glad I could bring Sasha home to her. 
While all this was going on, a tree service was cutting down a very large tree that had just up and died this summer and so there was all that noise and activity and as I walked from my house to hers and back, the smell of weed was strong in the air (don't take my word for it but I believe a lot of tree cutting guys smoke a lot of weed) and well, there was just a lot happening in my tiny little speck of the world. 

But my overall thought on all of this is that I am NOT a very good neighbor but I was glad to be able to listen to one today and to help another with a lost dog. 
The rest of my day was spent in just doing little things like making the chili crisp and I am not happy with the way it tastes because I tried to add more authenticity to it and make it a garlic chili crisp and somehow I fucked up the cooking of the garlic although it was not burnt or anything. 

Oh well. 

I suppose I could write a long and philosophical post with much humor, and at least a little hope, trying to wrap up my year here but fuck it. If I haven't said everything that needs to be said about 2025 in the last almost 365 posts I've written, then I don't have the slightest idea what more I could say. Instead I think I'll go make our supper.

Of course I wish all good things, happiness, and health to all of you and all of us here at the Church of the Batshit Crazy but overall, I think what I most want to say is thank you. Thank you for being here for my ramblings and my fears and my profane language and my irreverent and disrespectful take on so many things. You allow me to be me and that is a gift beyond measure. 

So. Bless our hearts, y'all, because if anyone ever needed their hearts blessed, it is we, the people, trying to hang on to democracy with our bleeding fingernails, trying to find the light in what appears to be some of the darkest times, trying to keep on, not give up, and work with what we have to the best of our abilities. 
Let us listen to those who need listening to and take home the dogs who wander. And hug like we mean it when we mean it. 

That is the best I can do. 

Love...Ms. Moon