Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Dearly Beloved

Have you gotten your computerized call asking if you'd like to sign a petition to get a state constitutional amendment declaring that marriage is something that can only be entered into between a man and a woman in order to protect the sanctity of marriage?

I have.

Scary shit there.

I've never understood why a marriage between a man and a man, or a woman and a woman threatens my own marriage. I mean, no matter how hard I try, I just can't see any correlation between gay marriage and the downfall of straight marriage. I guess that if two married gay guys moved in next door and they looked like they were having so much fun that my husband decided to divorce me and find a man of his own, it might threaten me, but I don't think it would really be the fault of the guys next door.

Frankly, it would seem to me that straight people are doing a fine job of screwing up the sacred sacrament of marriage all on their own.

Another one of the arguments these nimrods use against gay marriage is that God created marriage between a man and a woman for the purpose of procreation. But we all know plenty of straight couples who enter into marriage with no intention whatsoever of having children. Are we going to tell that darling 84-year old gent and his 80-year old sweetheart who met in the nursing home that they can't be married because they can't have children? What about the couple who just knows in their hearts that they don't want kids? On the other hand, there are plenty of gay couples who desperately want children and who will (and do) make terrific parents, no matter how the babies come their way. So that argument surely doesn't work for me.

Another reason cited frequently for denying gay marriage is that if we let gay people marry each other, then the next thing you know, polygamy will be legal and then, oh, I don't know, so will marrying sheep or your cousin or your brother or something on that order. One thing will lead to another, as we know.

Which all sounds a bit daunting, at first thought, but then the more I think about it, the less I care who marries whom. Frankly, if all parties are consenting adults (and I do mean consenting and I DO mean adults) then why should I care? If some lucky guy can find eight women who want to marry him and he can be an adequate husband and father to the women and all the children he produces, who am I to stand in his way?
And although it sounds...icky...and on a really deep emotional level...wrong, if a brother and a sister want to be married, and if they get genetic counseling before they breed, again- why should I care?

Now as to the sheep thing- I don't think a sheep can be consenting nor can a German Shepherd or a chimpanzee, no matter how intelligent. So forget the whole animal thing.


So yeah, if legalizing gay marriage leads to other alternative types of marriage, I guess I don't really care. Again, I don't think it's going to affect my own marriage.
I've had people ask me to officiate at weddings and I have always been honored to do so. I have married maybe a dozen couples, some straight and therefore legally, some gay and therefore illegally, but my criteria has always been more about love than the law. I respect anyone who chooses to get up in front of friends and family and vow to make a life together out of love. It's such a universally human desire to be married and I think it's a human right. I don't know if I'd perform a marriage for a man and his sister or a woman and two men, but maybe, if I knew the folks and they seemed sincerely in love and sincerely dedicated to each other, I might.

Yeah, I'm weird.

But God's honest truth is, is that my marriage is not like yours, even if you are a woman married to a man. Every marriage is as different as the people in it and every couple (or whatever) finds their own way to share their hearts and their lives together. How your marriage works is none of my business and how mine works is none of yours. That marriage works at all is a miracle and I don't think the gender of the participants is a huge factor.

So, no, I don't care to sign that petition. But thanks for asking.


  1. You are hardly wierd my friend.

    Society does not prohibit murders, rapists, child molesters, thieves and other like dregs of the earth to marry; but oh, we mustn't allow those queers who have found happiness with each to marry in order to protect the sanctity of marriage. How ludicrous and sanctimonious!

  2. Ludicrous and sanctimonious are the labels I would apply to this stupid amendment attempt. But you watch- it'll get on the ballot.
    Scares me to death.

  3. i agree with you. why does everyone feel they have to stick their nose in everyone else's business? it's ridiculous. i guess people have to have something to complain about/be unhappy about if their lives aren't the way they want it... (maybe that's harsh)

  4. HEAR!!! HEAR!!! Damn, we are SO on the same plain here! Well said. Well said!!!!

  5. Any WHY do these people care about what's going on in other people's houses? I think they have a very weird and sick obsession with other folk's sex lives because obviously, that's what this is all about. I sure don't want to know what's going on in Republican's bedrooms.
    Oh wait- they keep taking it to the public bathrooms.
    Which is just too weird.

  6. Excellent post Ms. Moon. I heard a great answer by a 94-year-old lady running for Senate when they asked her if she was in favor of gay marriage. She just said that she was in favor of love. And thank you for your comments about my story.

  7. Mr. Shife- thank YOU for dropping by. I think that 94-year old lady had it right. It IS about love. And the right to express it legally and all that entails.


Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.