Vacuuming Can Suck It

I did something today I hate doing with the passion of the heat of the surfaces of a thousand suns. 
I vacuumed. 
I doubt I've vacuumed in twenty years. I sweep. I dust mop. I do not vacuum. In fact, I don't even have a vacuum except for the Roomba which is out of commission due to needing replacement parts that I can't find online because they probably just want you to buy a whole new fucking Roomba and, also, that purple...object...which is a Dyson vacuum that I think used to be Jessie's and somehow it came to live in the little closet under the stairs but I never used it. Glen has used it to vacuum when we had fleas but I wouldn't touch it. 
Until today.
He'd pulled it out of the closet to get out a duffel bag or something and left it in the little nook beside the closet and the joke was that I was going to use it and I honestly did think I was going to. How bad can vacuuming be? Really? Many people do it regularly. And brooms are great but I will admit they don't get up everything. 
So today I actually plugged the ugly fucker in and after about five minutes of searching I finally found the power button (I am not kidding) and immediately remembered just how much I hate vacuuming. 
It did not help that the only attachment for this particular vacuum cleaner is for rugs. Or carpets. I don't know what happened to the other attachments but they did not come with the machine. I do not have carpets. I do have a few rugs. But mostly it's just the hardwood floors and I felt like I was scratching them all to pieces although I couldn't actually see any scratches. It annoyed the hell out of me though. I persevered for a few minutes before Mr. Moon got home at which time I told him that I still hated vacuuming and I was not going to do it and this attachment was not for wood floors. 
And a few more choice words. 
Now please understand. The man has never once asked me to vacuum or even wondered aloud why I don't. Mostly because I've told him at least a hundred times that I hate it. And because he's smart enough to know that bringing up my housekeeping habits is not something which would be wise or prudent to do. 
Look- I keep the toilets clean. And things are generally mostly tidy. 
And I sweep. And dust mop. Do I dust? 
Why do you ask? 

But I did vacuum (sort of) the guest room and also my bathroom which has many rugs, and our bedroom and then I unplugged the damn thing and figured out which button to use to make the cord suck back into its extremely unlovely body and I put it back in the closet and that is that. 

For the first part of my adult life, I had and used my grandmother's ancient (and I am talking either '30's or '40's) Electrolux which she replaced with a newer one before she got the dementia and forgot how to do housework or cook. It looked just like this. 

You will note that the wheel had not yet been invented and so it had runners. This thing was so heavy that my children called it "the dead pig." The hose would get clogged up after every five square feet of vacuuming at which point you'd have to get out the knitting needles and other assorted tools and see if you could somehow dislodge whatever was choking it. 
It was so loud that it would make babies and toddlers cry and send dogs run whining under the porch. 
Oh, it was a joy to use! 
This is probably why I hate vacuuming but I'm pretty sure that no matter what machine I had I would hate it. 

And that's my story of vacuuming for the first time in at least twenty years. Since I am now 71 years old, I believe we can safely say that there will be no more vacuuming in my future. 

I did spend a pleasant half hour sweeping the front porch and the side porch where the swing is. 

My plants look sorely neglected for one very good reason- they are- but they are living for the most part and I love their jungly presence. They are old and faithful friends by now. Some I would even call family members. 

I weeded the rows of carrots and greens on the north end of the garden which was not a whole lot of fun because the weeds are still in the tiny stage and I almost feel as if I should get out the tweezers instead of the trowel for many of them. I turned all four sprinklers on when I was done because despite that one rain we had this week, the dirt was dry as dust. There appears to be no rain in the forecast for over a week but it is going to be cooler so there is that. 

Here's a picture of some succulents I keep in the window of the laundry room so that I can admire them many times a day. The one on the left is from the bit I stole from an outdoor potted plant in Monticello which, last time I was there, I noted is still doing quite well despite my theft of one of its body parts.

And here's what the Spanish thyme I pinched (with permission!) from the garden at the restaurant where we ate for Lily's birthday. 

Gosh, I just love that plant. And the picture beside it is one Lily did and gave to me. Some of my very most favorite things are in that laundry room. The little dinosaur is one I found in the yard and you can see just the merest hint of a butterfly that Boud made. 

Mr. Moon and Gibson had a great time together today AND the truck is fixed! It wasn't the fuel pump, it was a fuse and miracle of miracles, Glen had some replacements in his tool box. There are other details about a water something, something, and batteries but the point is- it's running. And Gibson helped him. The sheet rock hangers did indeed show up and that was also a big relief. 

I have no idea how to end this mess so I'll just say-

Love...Ms. Moon