Hot. And I'm Not Talking About Brad Pitt

That is the extent of my picture-taking efforts today. I took it when I was watering the porch plants. I liked the way that unimpressive begonia blossom looked with those sincerely cool wall decorations that I got at Wag the Dog a long time ago. 
Definitely made by a real human. 

Lord god almighty, it is hot. This is the sort of hot that makes you feel foolish about complaining when it wasn't quite this hot. This is the sort of hot that makes you wonder why in hell anyone lives here in the summer. This is the sort of hot that wilts the plants, the trees, the flowers, the humans. This is the sort of hot that makes one long for a swimming pool. This is the sort of hot that drives people to the icy-watered springs and the rivers they feed. This is the sort of hot that makes cows and horses stand together under whatever meager bit of shade they can find. This is the sort of hot that makes the cicadas chant warnings and birds grow still and the sound of the air conditioners is heard across the land. This is the sort of hot that makes people abandon their gardens even if there are still tomatoes and beans to pick because it's just not worth the effort. This is the sort of hot that blooms mold and mildew on any damp thing it can get its filthy, fiery breath on. This is the sort of hot that makes dogs dig caves in the cool dirt under the porch steps and sleep in them all day. This is the sort of hot that when you step out of your air conditioned car, snatches your breath. 

And so forth. I could go on all day but you probably get the idea.

I went to town today to get things for Mark and for our trip and also my sunglasses. I tried taking a picture of myself in them but I cannot stand the way I look, even with glittery, cool sunglasses on. I cannot bear it. I simply go through the world looking out from behind this mask that cruel age has set upon me, pretending that it's not there. Yes. I am that vain and that self-delusional. 

But I do really like the sunglasses. I feel like an aged and tawdry Hollywood has-been. All I need is some scarlet lipstick, thick layers of pancake make-up, and rouge to complete the picture.

I wore my new blue dress. It is so comfortable. Lily and I went to lunch together and I spilled a drop of salad dressing on it. 
"Damn," I said. "My new dress!" 
And Lily said, "That's a new dress? I thought it was your old one!" 
They do share several similarities and I have no doubt passed on the genes I have which are sort of useless when it comes to remembering details on things we've seen a hundred times. A thousand times. Lily said that she's always been worried that if she witnessed a crime and the police asked her to describe the suspect, she would have no idea how to do that. I am the same. I told her that I've always feared one of my children going missing (well of course!), one of the reasons being that if they asked me what the child was wearing when they disappeared, I would have to admit I had no idea. 
"Clothing?" I would say. 

But I got two very nice compliments on the dress. Mostly the color and I get compliments on the other dress that Lily confused it for on its color. They are, as I said, quite similar in that regard. 
I mean- a Flax dress is a Flax dress. 

I am not at all ready to leave on Wednesday. I keep thinking that I can easily get everything done tomorrow that I need to get done. I suppose I will get it all done but it's probably not going to be that easy. My plan is to pack lighter than I usually do. When we're up there, I only wear my overalls at the house and a dress when we go out but we don't go out that often. And when I say "go out" I mean to a restaurant or something because I wear the overalls while shopping for groceries and stuff too. Also, I really don't need to take books to read to the boys and I don't need to bring art supplies and I don't need to bring kitchen tools and I don't need to bring mass quantities of food. I do need to bring the martini shaker. And the vodka. Booze is expensive in North Carolina. I do not know why but it is. I need to bring my pillows and also my bedside fan which I cannot sleep without and a power strip and all my meds and my hormones and, and, and...

I am going to be busy tomorrow. And I couldn't even get books from the library today because it is closed on Mondays. Will I go back tomorrow to get some? I better! 

Meanwhile, life in Lloyd continues apace and I need to go make us some supper. I'm going to make clam spaghetti because I only have to use two burners and not for very long. I'll make salad too because of course I will make salad too. The Caprese salad last night was so damn good that I might just make it again tonight. When you have the tomatoes, use the tomatoes. I am sure there may be a point when you've had enough Caprese salad to last you a few months but we are not nearly there yet and the tomatoes are but a fleeting dream we have in winter. 
Just like the coolness of winter is a fleeting dream right now. 

Love...Ms. Moon